


No Homo

by Parameme



Category: Paramore
Genre: M/M, Unrequited Love, Zaylor (Paramore), mlm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-23
Updated: 2018-04-23
Packaged: 2018-12-19 03:47:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 23,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11889321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Parameme/pseuds/Parameme
Summary: Zac likes Taylor. Taylor doesn't like him back. But Zac is determined to change that.





	1. bros

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, first time I'm posting to ao3. Yes, this will be a boring first chapter but I promise it'll get better.

Taylor _did_ not want to go to college. He didn't have much going for him in high school to begin with, but the idea of constantly being surrounded by drunken idiots was not exactly appealing to him. School was not enjoyable, mainly because he struggled academically. Music was all he knew, but even that he found himself struggling with from time to time.

But, as his mom had told him, maybe he just needed to come out of his shell a little bit. He had applied to many colleges and had just recently committed to a university that had accepted him.

The curly-haired high school senior sat on his bed as he scrolled through Facebook. Usually, he was anti-Facebook. But NYU, the college he had finally decided on, had the option of choosing a roommate through it. He did not want to have his roommate chosen for him, that would never turn out well. After his oldest brother had made the mistake of having his roommate chosen for him and ended up being stuck with an alcoholic pothead who only listened to Eminem, Taylor knew better.

See, he wanted to live with someone who had a major that was similar to what he would be majoring in: music technology. He continued to scroll, skipping every shirtless dude who was flexing his muscles in his profile photo. What was their goal in doing that?

He also wanted to dorm with someone who lived in Tennessee. Yes, he was picky. But he'd be living with them for at least a year, so why _not_ be picky? He needed to have something in common with them. The more they had in common, the easier the months together would be.

Just as he was about to shut his laptop and give up searching for the day, a notification appeared. He had received a message.

From the second Taylor looked at the stranger's profile photo, he had doubts. The dude's picture was an awkward selfie. And to make matters worse, he had a mustache. Never trust a guy with a mustache.

**Zac Farro:** _Hey! I'm attending NYU next fall and saw you on the page for the class of 2021. I've been looking for someone to live with next year and wanted to find someone else who lived in TN. I also wanted to find someone who is majoring in a music related topic like I am, which didn't seem likely. But being as how you live in Nashville and are majoring in music technology, it must be a match. Send me a message if you're interested_.

Okay, maybe he wasn't _too_ terrible. He wanted the same exact things that Taylor wanted, which definitely helped. Still seemed a little weird, so Taylor would keep his guard up to make sure this stranger didn't have any ill intentions, but he could have been worse.

**Taylor York:** _I've been looking for someone similar. Haven't had much luck so far. But to be fair, I haven't searched too much. I'm minoring in music theory and composition. Boring stuff, I know, but it'll hopefully help me in the long run. I'm glad you reached out to me. What are you majoring in?_

**Zac Farro:** _Music business. Do you play any instruments?_

Taylor looked up at the acoustic guitar that sat in the dusty corner of his bedroom. Maybe it was time he started practicing that more.

**Taylor York:** _Mostly guitar. But I can play other instruments too. I'm decent at drums. You?_

Wow, very interesting conversation. He felt like he was talking to a distant relative who had not seen him since he was seven years old. All that was missing from the conversation was Zac telling him how big he had gotten since they had last seen each other.

No, that's not a sexual joke. Get your mind out of the gutter.

They went on and on about little things about one another. At one point, Zac was going to confess, as casually as possible, that he was gay. But when he remembered that this guy he was speaking to was a fellow Tennessean, he decided that maybe it wasn't a great idea. He knew how his peers were. It seemed like an important thing to know, but Zac would take note of how Taylor acted towards homosexuals before making any mention of his own sexuality. Besides, if Taylor didn't need to clarify his sexuality, why did Zac need to clarify his own?

Finally, after what felt like an eternity of boring small talk, they discussed meeting in town.

**Taylor York:** _There's this little coffee shop I go to every Saturday, it's in downtown Nashville. If that's alright by you for meeting up, just send me your number and I'll text you the name of the place and the address._

**Zac Farro:** _Sounds good. I have nothing going on this Saturday so we can meet there. My number is..._

It felt like they were planning a date. Just a casual date between two bros. Both of them hoped that this would work out; neither of them wanted to continue the search for a roommate. Hopefully, it would turn out better than expected.


	2. nothing is as boring as you

Zac and Taylor had discussed meeting at the local coffee shop that Taylor was a regular of. Taylor, the older of the two, sat at a small table within the shop, a spare chair positioned across from him. He stared down at his wristwatch, which was precisely two minutes behind. He watched the seconds hand tick.

The other male walked in, a red beanie pulled over his hair, strands of chocolate brown hair managing to peek out under the hat. He flashed a smile in Taylor's direction, waving as he approached the other male.

Zac extended his arm, soon shaking Taylor's hand. "It's nice to meet you," the younger male spoke. Taylor just nodded with an awkward smile. He didn't say a word.

"Wanna get something to drink or eat?" Taylor asked after a few seconds of awkward silence between them.

"Sounds good," Zac said with a goofy grin. They entered the line, no words being shared between them.

Until they sat down, drinks in hand, neither of them spoke a word to one another.

Taylor was the one to break the silence. "So, uh, just tell me everything I should know about you. How late you stay up, how early you wake up, stuff like that. I don't want to be living with someone who's completely different from me." Cue an awkward laugh from Taylor.

They went on and on about that boring stuff. But both of them could tell that they weren't bonding at all. The conversation wasn't going anywhere and they didn't even know if they liked each other yet. How were they supposed to know how they felt about the other if they didn't _really_ know much about each other? Knowing a person's sleeping schedule isn't exactly considered bonding. They couldn't tell if they even enjoyed the presence of one another, the conversation was too dull.

"What's your favorite band?" Zac randomly asked in an attempt to remove the obvious tension between them.

"My favorite band? Oh god, uh, I'm not sure. I love mewithoutYou. I also love Radiohead, but who doesn't, you know? Tame Impala are pretty rad, too. I don't know, I like a lot of different music. I'm not picky."

Alright, they were _finally_ getting somewhere with this conversation. Finally learning a little bit about each other.

"I _love_ Radiohead, don't even get me started. The Beatles. Talking Heads. Tame Impala, too, like you said. I can listen to some heavy music too, I can work with that. Especially since I'm a drummer, I like playing things where I'm really active. I like to move around. Even though that can end up taking a huge toll after a few songs, I like it."

"Rad," Taylor commented with a wide grin. He felt an actual connection starting to form between him and his possible future roommate.

Both of them took small sips from their own cups of coffee, both of them smiling like the idiots they truly were.

"How old were you when you started playing drums?" Taylor asked.

"Technically, I _started_ playing at the age of nine. But it wasn't until I was eleven that I started playing on an _actual_ drum kit. My older brother plays guitar, I think that encouraged me to get into music. People always looked at me as the little brother who just followed in his footsteps. So that's why I didn't pick up a guitar and let him teach me his ways. I wanted to be different. I didn't want to be like him, I guess," he said with a soft chuckle, but behind it was an expression of sadness that he failed to hide. "Okay, sorry, I'm getting too deep. This is getting too sad. Uh, tell me all about _you_ , now."

"Well, I got my first guitar when I was in first grade. My dad got it for me. A little Baby Taylor acoustic guitar. Obviously, this made first grade me _very_ excited. My name's Taylor, I was the baby of the family, and I just got a Baby Taylor guitar. There were _two_ Baby Taylors. _Two_. Like I said, I was very excited. My brother plays guitar too, so does my dad. Had to keep it going. Runs in the family. I always wanted to be like both of them. Now? Not so much, but I was little," he shrugged. Zac's stupid smile did not disappear for even a second.

"So, what made you decide your major?" Zac asked.

Taylor shrugged again. "I don't know, I just think it's something that can get me places in life. I've always wanted to work with music, that's always been definite. My dad works at a record label, he's taught me so much. In addition, getting an internship shouldn't be too hard with help from my dad. And then for my minor, well, being good at composing music is huge. It can make you _plenty_ of money. I know that I could totally do all of this without a college education, but my parents said that if I go to college, they'll pay my tuition. If I don't, I'll be forced to either pay them rent or move out. I think it's obvious which I chose. I'll torture myself with more school. How did you decide?"

"I always wanted to do something in music, too. Honestly, I'm still not entirely sure on _what_ I want to do with my life, but having this degree as a backup will help me, I know that for sure. Music business can help me get a job at a record label, maybe, and there are plenty of those in our area _and_ in New York. I don't know, just felt like a safe route to go."

Taylor slowly nodded. "Maybe, if all goes well, I'll be able to land you a job with my dad's company." Another shrug came from him.

"Let's hope we don't hate each other by the time we're graduating," Taylor said, sending Zac a wink and taking a sip from his cup of coffee.

Maybe this wouldn't be _too_ bad.


	3. best kept secret

The drive from Tennessee to New York felt never ending. Those thirteen hours that Taylor spent in the car — only getting out of it on the occasion where he and his family would stop for food or to use the bathroom — felt so much longer than that.

Taylor and his parents spent one night in a hotel. Well, a motel, really. Calling it a hotel would be an insult to hotels everywhere. The televisions were those big, old-style TVs that Taylor couldn't believe still existed. The rooms smelled of cigarettes, vomit, and a little bit of mildew.

The three Yorks couldn't wait to get out of there.

As soon as they could, they left the motel, got into their car — which had a UHaul connected to it that held all of Taylor's college necessities — and made their way to Taylor's temporary home.

Taylor and Zac had already discussed who would bring what. Taylor would bring the mini fridge and gaming console, Zac would bring the microwave and the television. The most difficult part of the entire process was the routine of carrying things up the stairs and to the room in the blistering late-August heat. Keep in mind that no elevator was available in the building. By the time Zac and his family had arrived, the York family was ready to say goodbye. Taylor had sweat through his navy blue shirt, a trail of perspiration having formed down his top. The trail formed a triangular shape along the front of his shirt, causing the otherwise loose fabric sticking to his chest.

That was a nice sight for Zac to see.

Once Mr. and Mrs. York had left their son, Taylor did his best to help Zac set up. But he was exhausted and wanted to nap more than he wanted to help. He could barely keep his eyes open. Not only was he exhausted from the strenuous labor he had been involved in, but it hadn't been very easy to get a good night's sleep in the motel that he had stayed in the night prior.

The lack of air conditioning did not help anything. Once Zac's parents said their goodbyes to both their son and to Taylor, the older of the two boys tore his shirt off and stood in front of one of the two fans that they had placed in their room, both of his arms extended away from his body.

This whole staying in the closet and resisting the constant urge of asking Taylor to fuck him was not going to be an easy task for Zac.

After a little bit of relaxing, their door came open. Without being welcomed in, their resident advisor, or RA, walked in. Even though both of the college freshmen were several feet away from the strange looking, bearded male, they could tell that he reeked of alcohol, marijuana, and cigarettes. Without a doubt, the most prominent scent was the weed. He was either a total pothead _or_ a skunk had gotten scared near their room. Probably the former. Not very appealing. Taylor pulled on a clean shirt.

"Hey, what is up..." his voice trailed off as his eyes focused on the clipboard in his hands. He squinted his bloodshot eyes and then finished his sentence with, "Zachary and Taylor! It's nice to meet you guys, I'm Jeremy, your RA for this year. My room is right at the end of the hall, so make sure to come to me if you ever need _anything."_

"Will do," Taylor said with a phony smile and gave him a small salute. The only thing they would come to him for would be drugs.

Jeremy left the room, but the boys could hear him giving an almost identical introduction to the students in the room next to theirs. The walls were quite thin. Interesting.

After a few seconds of silence, Zac's phone buzzed. He stood up. "Hey, uh, do you want to come with me to meet my friend? She goes here and has an apartment this year. She's a sophomore, but _anyway_ , I understand if you're tired and would rather sleep..."

Taylor shrugged his broad shoulders and pushed himself to his feet. He stretched his arms, a little yawn escaping his lips. "I'll come along."

His mom would be proud of him. He knew that he needed to branch out, he needed to at least make an effort or else he wouldn't make _any_ friends. Easier said than done, but he could try.

Zac guided his roommate out of the building in which they would be living in for the entirety of their freshman year. Both of them were lost, Zac scratching the back of his neck as he looked around. They had no idea where they were going.

Zac went onto his phone and clicked his friend's contact, calling the person.

"Hey, my roommate and I just came out of our dorm. Can you come pick us up? No, I don't care what we...okay, that sounds good. We'll see you soon. Bye."

Zac ended the call and forced his phone into his pocket. He guided Taylor to the sidewalk, where they would then wait nearly ten minutes under the boiling sun for Zac's friend to appear.

Eventually, said friend showed up. A beaten down silver car came rolling down the road. It stopped at the curb and a tinted window rolled down, showing Zac's friend to be a girl with bleached hair. Taylor noted that the girl looked too small to even have her license. But whatever.

Zac approached the car, Taylor closely following. The girl stayed in her vehicle.

"Hey Zac, and uh..." the girl's voice trailed off as she looked at Taylor, who was still a stranger to her.

Taylor took a step closer and introduced himself. "I'm Taylor, it's nice to meet you."

They shook hands and the girl introduced herself as well, squinting up at the curly-haired brunette due to the sun that could be seen peeking out from behind him. "I'm Hayley. Zac's friend from back home. Get in, guys, I'm hungry."

Taylor hadn't eaten since the night prior. He had been so eager to leave the motel he had stayed at that food had been the last thing on his mind. But as he climbed into the silver car, his stomach grumbled. Maybe it was time for lunch.

Zac sat in the passenger's seat, chatting with Hayley about how things were up in Franklin.

Taylor sat in the back, his eyes watching cars speed by and focusing on people who walked down the busy sidewalks of Manhattan.

Taylor started to pay attention to the conversation between Zac and his friend once she started to talk about the adjustment of moving from the South to New York.

"It's different. _Very_ different. We grew up in these places where nothing was ever meant to change. Look, you know I love Tennessee with all my heart, but I feel... _free_ here, especially with Lindsey. And I think you're going to understand that, Zac. I know how terrified you were back at home and how you didn't think you could be the person you are. But up here, I _promise_ you that nobody is going to judge you for being the way you are."

Zac knew exactly what Hayley was referring to. His eyes went wide and he looked at Hayley, quickly shaking his head to tell her _no, shut up._

She got the message and understood. But Taylor, on the other hand, was confused. Why would anyone judge Zac? Taylor saw no reason for any judgment but that was because he was oblivious to Zac's sexuality. He ignored Hayley's words, pushing them to the back of his mind for the time being.

" _Anyway_ , you guys won't _believe_ how amazing New York pizza is. Unfortunately, finding parking is almost impossible."

As the three of them enjoyed their pizza and Taylor bonded with the other two about life back in Tennessee, he began to think about what Hayley had said. What did she mean by Zac being the _way he is?_ And why wouldn't it be accepted in Tennessee?

Taylor wanted to know. But maybe if Zac wanted him to know, he would tell him.


	4. don't threaten me with a good time

By the time the first weekend of the first semester rolled around, it was already time for fraternity rushing to begin. The closest thing to friends Taylor had at the time was the friendships he shared with Zac and Hayley. But still, he barely knew Hayley and even though Zac was a cool guy, he wanted to befriend _more_ guys.

"Are you _sure_ you don't want to rush with me? There's free food at the event," Taylor said to his roommate in an attempt to persuade him. He didn't want to be all alone.

"It's fine," Zac said, not taking his eyes off of the screen of his phone. "I considered rushing but there's only one frat I wanted to join. But considering it's not guaranteed I would even make it into it, I'll pass."

"Oh yeah? Which frat?" Taylor asked, buttoning the last button of his dark shirt as he looked in the mirror.

"Uh, I think it was called Delta Lambda Phi. All those frats have _such_ stupid names, it's very discouraging."

Taylor turned around with raised brows. He let out a small laugh. "Isn't that the gay frat? It would be weird for you to join."

That was the only reason Zac was interested in joining.

He let out an awkward laugh and looked at Taylor. " _What?_ Since when? That's crazy. So glad I decided not to try to join it, thanks for letting me know."

Taylor was oblivious.

"Alright, I'll see you tonight. I'm not sure how late I'll be getting back."

The rest of that day was spent meeting various members of various fraternities. It was terrifying. Taylor did his best to _not_ isolate himself, but social anxiety doesn't stop for anybody.

Based on how the members of some of the top frats acted towards him, he thought the night was going pretty well. Part of why he was as nervous as he was is because he knew that _if_ he made it into any of the frats, it wasn't just immediate acceptance. To be officially accepted, the fraternity members would find something crazy that Taylor and the frat's other new members would be forced to do to prove their allegiance to the fraternity.

Sounded more like a cult once he thought about it.

There were a few fraternities that Taylor was interested in. The only thing that wasn't ideal, and partially turned Taylor away from the entire idea of rushing, was the Greek names. Not that anything was wrong with Greek, just that there was probably nobody in any of his school's fraternities that was actually of Greek descent.

By the time Taylor returned to his dorm, it was nearly midnight. Zac was fast asleep and Taylor couldn't wait to fall asleep as well.

The following weekend, the rushing experience continued. But this time, it would be decided who made it into the frats and who would be sent home. The best way Taylor could describe it was by comparing it to an episode of American Idol. Except the reward of making it into a frat involved the consumption of ridiculous amounts of alcohol and _not_ fame (at least, not for any good reasons). And instead of being sent home they would be sent back to a gross dorm room to drown their sorrows away with the same amount of booze they would consume if they had made it into the frat.

The fraternity that Taylor felt his interview with had gone the best and he had chosen as his first preference out of all of the frats — which went by the ridiculous name of Zeta Psi — requested a second interview with him. It was more intimate, less professional than the previous one had been. (Even though the previous one hadn't been all too "professional" anyway. None of the interviews were).

This second interview involved questions about how often he liked to party, his favorite drinks, and various other questions that the frat seemed to care about more than any questions asked during the first interview.

He spoke to other fraternities for a second interview, but he had no doubt that the one that had spoken to him first was still his top pick.

By eleven o'clock that night, it was decided who made it into which frat. Then came a confusing process that was mainly for guys who had made it into multiple frats — which Taylor could not _believe_ he did. Three fraternities wanted him, but he had to let two of them down to say that he had chosen to accept the bid from Zeta Psi.

He could put up with the ridiculous name. It would be worth it.


	5. hazing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning that this chapter gets a lil gross. more so just for comic relief and to make the book longer i guess. but nonetheless, enjoy!

For Taylor, the next few weeks were mostly filled with bonding with his future frat brothers. He didn't realize that he wouldn't _just_ be hazed and go through a scarring initiation process, but he had to bond with the others so they could be sure he was "right" for the fraternity. What did he need to do other than drink and fuck? That's all fraternity brothers do, right?

The scariest part was in the beginning when he had to meet _individually_ with various older members of the frat who would guide him through the process of pledging and would support him through it. This person would be called his "big brother". This big brother would be an upperclassman who would essentially be his mentor until one of them left either the school or the frat.

His big brother ended up being a senior by the name of Jon who he luckily had plenty in common with. Both of them enjoyed similar music and were attending the school for similar majors, both played guitar. What else could Taylor want?

Luckily, all of this didn't take too long. By early October, it was time for him to officially be initiated. If he could take it, that is.

Jon, his "big brother", promised him that it wouldn't be so bad, that the hazing experience would be _completely_ worth it. But Taylor didn't believe that for a second. He didn't know what he'd be forced to go through, but he _really_ hoped that he wouldn't be branded. Just the thought of that made him feel uneasy.

"Alright, pledges," one of the seniors who was in charge of the cult — I mean the _frat_ — said. "We've decided what you will need to do to prove your allegiance. Get the milk," the senior said to several of the younger fraternity brothers. Proving their allegiance? _Definitely_ sounded like a cult.

Out came _several_ gallons of milk, one for each of the new pledges. This didn't seem so bad in Taylor's eyes. So what? It's just milk. Not the best beverage in the world but he'd rather be drinking a gallon of milk than that much alcohol. Death didn't sound fun. Not yet. Maybe later.

" _All_ of you will be finishing your own gallons of milk. And if you don't? Well, we will be saying goodbye to you. Pledges, come on."

"What if we throw up?" Someone asked.

"All I'll say is that you _really_ don't want to throw up. I'm sure that some of you will and you will see the consequence when the time comes."

That was not very reassuring.

All of the new pledges stepped forward and each of them were given a large gallon of milk. Once Taylor held the drink in his hand and realized the weight of it, he realized maybe it wouldn't be so easy.

Taylor removed the cap and started drinking. One of the other pledges quietly said, "I'm lactose intolerant." But the older brothers had no pity, still demanding that he drink the _entire_ gallon.

Taylor usually didn't even drink that much _water_ throughout the course of an entire _day_. But he went on.

After around twenty seconds, he pulled the large gallon away from his lips and held it up. Less than halfway done. His stomach already ached.

He continued drinking until he was halfway done, that half being a living hell. He had no idea how he would finish it. He leaned over, hand on his stomach. A loud burp left his lips, which caused the older members — all of whom had already gone through their own grueling initiation processes during the years prior — to laugh. Sounds of coughing and gagging filled the frat house, even one person _begging_ for them to let him do something else.

But they were ruthless, forcing the weak freshman to continue drinking.

The first guy to throw up held his stomach with both hands, his body shaking as the milk came back up. Taylor couldn't even watch.

The older frat members laughed over this, one of them walking up and punching the younger male _right_ in the stomach. He collapsed onto the floor, dry heaving.

Taylor's eyes went wide but he didn't say anything. He was determined to finish.

So Taylor took small sips at a time. He was sure that there was _no_ way he'd be able to drink milk ever again after this night.

He placed the gallon of milk on the ground at a certain point. By then, he had drank at least two-thirds of the milk. He bent over, his mouth open. As if the feeling of drinking all that milk wasn't terrible enough, the sound and _smell_ of everything going on was enough. Taylor vomited on the floor, facing the pain of a punch in the gut shortly after. He winced, hands on his stomach. He wasn't sure what hurt the most, the torturous feeling of the beverage filling his stomach, the disgusting feeling of throwing up, or the gut punch.

Even though Taylor felt disgusting, he forced himself to continue. He was determined now. He drank more and more until just under one-fourth was left. Of course, he threw up a second time, was punished with another punch to the gut, and _somehow_ continued.

He was the third of all of the new pledges to finish the milk, joining the two others in throwing up _all of it_. Once he stood up, his stomach emptied, Jon approached him. He gave Taylor a firm pat on the back and said, "Good job, man. Welcome to the frat."

That pat on the back wasn't a great idea. Taylor leaned over, threw up on his own shoes, and then stood up straight with his hands on his stomach. Maybe his stomach wasn't as empty as he had thought. A milk mustache mingled with Taylor's stubble, which was not a great look for him.

"I think I'm gonna go back to my dorm now," he said groggily, almost passing out before he could even make it out the door of the frat house. Suddenly, he wished he was given alcohol instead of milk. Not even death seemed to be as bad as this.

He took a bus back to the building he and Zac lived in and made his way back to his dorm room, where he found Zac eating a cup of ramen noodles and watching an old rerun of Friends. Just the _thought_ of food made Taylor gag. He climbed into his bed, his back turned to Zac.

"How was it?" Zac asked his roommate, even though he knew full well that part of being in a frat meant being sworn into secrecy when it came to the hazing experience.

"I don't wanna talk about it," Taylor mumbled, curling up into a ball on his bed and pushing his face into his pillow.


	6. never fallen faster

On the Friday following the scarring experience — which left Taylor unable to even _look_ at milk for months — there was a party being held at Taylor's frat house. Somehow, he had been able to convince Zac to come along with him.

"This is _stupid_ ," Zac complained as they walked towards the frat house. The cool, mid-October breeze sent chills up and down Taylor's exposed, muscular arms. Maybe he should have listened to Zac and brought a jacket.

"It's not _stupid_. Maybe you'll even find a hot chick that'll hook up with you," Taylor said with a wink. Yeah, because that was _totally_ what Zac was looking for. Not like he wanted to get with his _roommate_ or anything.

As a large house came into view, Zac pointed to it and said, "I'm guessing _that_ is it."

Taylor nodded. Maybe it was the booming music that gave it away. Or maybe it was the people passed out outside the house. Or maybe it was the giant Greek letters. Either way, it was very obvious.

Even though Taylor wanted Zac to feel like this was going to be a great time, Taylor found himself to be more nervous than his roommate. What if he did something wrong? He didn't respond to alcohol too well.

A large man stood at the door of the frat house, his muscular arms crossed over his chest. Taylor assumed that this stranger was some sort of security guard. So _that_ must have been where the money from his registration fee went, to bulky security guards that they didn't need.

Taylor ignored the massive man's presence and tried to enter the house. He was stopped.

"Name?" The intimidating man asked, his voice shockingly deep.

"Taylor, uh, Taylor York. I'm in the fraternity, I'm a new member."

The guy stared at him for a minute with squinted eyes and then mumbled, "Go ahead in. What about you?" He asked Zac, who remained wide-eyed and speechless.

"He's my friend. My plus one, if you will," Taylor explained. The frats on campus had a strict rule; if a guy wanted to attend one of their parties but was not in the frat, then too bad, no coming. The only way they would be allowed in would be if one of the frat brothers invited them.

The security guard rolled his eyes and gestured for the two boys to go in. Taylor squinted as soon as he entered the house, smoke from cigarettes, weed and probably a few other substances clouding up his vision.

He turned around to face Zac. "Just stay close to me," he shouted over the loud music. He made it appear as though he would be protecting Zac, as if Zac would get lost if he were left alone for even a minute. In reality, Taylor was a little scared. Okay, _very_ scared, actually. He hadn't gone to many high school parties. This was for several reasons, but mostly because he was never cool enough to be invited.

Another reason was that he had no self-control when it came to alcohol. Once he had just _one_ drink, he couldn't _not_ help himself to drinking another, and another, and another.

The only frat brother who Taylor _really_ knew, Jon, approached him from behind and gave his back a slap. Taylor instantly turned around but calmed down when he saw Jon's face.

"Nice to see you," Taylor yelled over the blasting music that was playing throughout the place.

"Nice to see you too. Is that your friend?" He asked, pointing to the awkward brunet who stood a few feet behind Taylor.

"Yeah," he shouted.

"Would you guys want to come play beer pong? I'm playing with my buddy Aaron and we need people to go against. Interested?"

They were still shouting over the playing music.

Taylor nodded and gestured for his roommate to join him, bringing an arm around Zac's shoulder as they were led through the house. They were eventually brought down to the basement. It was so much quieter.

There weren't many people down there besides the four boys who were planning on playing beer pong. There were a couple of guys who were talking in one area, a girl who was crying to her friends in a separate area, and Taylor was sure that he saw a guy getting a handjob in another area.

College was fucking weird.

Taylor had high hopes and _really_ thought he and Zac were going to win. That was not the case, unfortunately. Taylor was, by far, the worst competitor out of the four players.

Zac did great, it was Taylor who didn't do so well during the competition. Well, Zac didn't do _great_ , maybe that's an exaggeration. But considering he had been successful in throwing the ping pong balls into the cups of beer a total of two times and Taylor had done so precisely zero times, Zac seemed pretty great in Taylor's eyes.

Plus, Jon and Aaron were older than them, therefore they were much more experienced in the art of beer pong. It wasn't even a close competition.

"Come on, let's get you home," Zac said to his roommate once the game was over. Taylor was the one who had (voluntarily) drank most of the alcohol, there being a total of eight beers in his body. The other male had only consumed two drinks. Taylor was stumbling, his body needing support from Zac.

"I feel sick," Taylor complained. Zac just laughed at him and gave him a pat on the back.

"We'll be back in our dorm soon. I'll get us an Uber," Zac said to his drunk roommate as they left the party and walked towards the busy street.

Fifteen minutes later, both of them sat in the backseat of a stranger's car. Taylor's head rested on Zac's shoulder, his open mouth drooling onto Zac's white shirt.

Every few minutes, a small groan or something similar would leave Taylor's lips. Zac just held him close, his fingers running through his roommate's dark curls.

As if he had any doubts prior, Zac was certain of one thing; he was falling for Taylor.


	7. be alone with me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: smut

"I'll be back in an hour or so," Taylor said to his roommate while he collected the books he would need for a small study session that was being held between him and a few students who were in one of his classes.

Zac nodded his head, not taking his eyes off of his laptop. He had plans for his alone time.

As soon as Zac heard the door slam shut, he closed the tab that his computer was on. He glanced at the door one more time to be sure it had been shut.

He returned his gaze to his laptop, quickly putting the browser in private mode and heading onto a porn site that he particularly enjoyed.

Zac hadn't been able to do this since the summer. He and Taylor were almost _always_ together, and on the rare occasion that they were not together, Zac was either busy or exhausted. He had considered jerking off in the shower, but it being in public stopped him.

He pushed off the sweatpants and boxers that had previously covered the lower half of his body. His shirt stayed on, though. He didn't want to waste any time whatsoever.

Zac was eager to finally get himself off. He could not count on both hands the amount of times he had fought back a boner while in Taylor's presence.

Zac awkwardly reached under the bed, finding a small bottle of lube that he had secretly stashed underneath and had been hoping to use. He refocused himself on his computer, searching for a video that suited his interests. He thought it would be easy to find something considering how long he had been waiting to touch himself. But this was not the case.

The issue was obvious. Before meeting Taylor, Zac didn't have a type. _At all_. He had fucked a few guys before — or, on most occasions, had been the one _being_ fucked — but he had never had a boyfriend, never had a serious crush on anyone he had encountered. He was constantly in Taylor's presence, though, so there was no time for the crush to fade away. So ever since he had developed this crush on Taylor, he had a very specific taste in men.

What he wanted was an 18 year old, curly haired brunet boy who was almost 6 feet tall, played guitar and was named Taylor Benjamin York.

This crush that Zac had developed was such a foreign concept to him. Never before had he faced such a dilemma. Any feelings that he had ever felt for anyone usually stemmed no further than wanting sex. He was good with steering clear of straight men that he knew he had no chance with. Taylor, of course, was an example of a straight man he had no chance with.

Zac spent several minutes repositioning his body. He ended up facing away from the door of his dorm room, laptop across from him. No longer on his back, he rested on his knees with his finger positioned at his entrance and his other hand hovering above the keyboard of his computer. It was a very awkward position, his arm behind his back and bent at the wrist. It would be well worth it, though.

He eventually chose a video with very little thought, not paying too much attention to what was taking place on the screen. All he could think about was Taylor.

Before doing _anything_ , he had made sure to apply a generous amount of lube to his index and middle finger, both of which would later be inserted into his entrance.

When he slid his fingers in — eyes squeezed shut due to the pain _and_ so he could imagine Taylor being there with him — he whined aloud. Knowing how thin the walls that separated him and his neighbors were turned him on even more.

Considering only one hand was available, Zac had no choice but to pour the lubrication he needed directly onto his length, fighting back a moan that was caused by the cool temperature of the liquid. His shaky hand quickly wrapped around his cock, spreading the lube around. He shivered when his thumb stroked his tip.

He moved his body up and down at a steady pace. However, his breathing pattern was not as steady as the movement of his body. The stretch burned, but this was nothing new to him. He had grown to tolerate the feeling, especially with knowing that the pain would pass and pleasure would soon take over.

All Zac needed to do was find that one spot. As he rode his own fingers, stroking his length, he continued to wiggle his fingers here and there in search of the special spot that would have him finishing in no time.

Finally, he found it. He couldn't fight back the moan that soon left his lips. All he could picture was Taylor being underneath him, the curly-haired boy's cock replacing Zac's fingers.

The thought alone was making Zac even harder.

Since he had finally found that special spot, he removed his digits, coated them in more lube, and forced _three_ fingers into himself. Similarly to the first two, the sting caused him to whine. The pain quickly subsided and he couldn't fight back the pleasure that was building up inside of him.

Considering Zac and Taylor were roommates, they had seen each other naked more than once. It was always nonchalant, as if they were just two buddies changing in the locker room. But Zac would always sneak a peek whenever Taylor was nude around him. There was one occasion where Taylor had woken up a little _excited_ and Zac was impressed by what he saw. Considering his size, Zac was not sure if three fingers would be enough to prepare him for what he wanted.

His hand that was wrapped around his length increased in speed. He knew he couldn't last much longer.

He stopped the movement of his hand momentarily and grabbed a few tissues from the tissue box that he had placed on the desk beside his bed for a moment like this. It didn't take much longer, only a few more flicks of his wrist and he found himself biting his lower lip to fight back moans. They still could be heard, just not half as loud as they wanted to be. His release covered the tissues as his orgasm washed over him.

He did not adjust his position on the bed. The video continued to play on his laptop and his fingers remained where they were.

Not much longer after, Taylor returned to the building. The classmates that he was supposed to study with had all decided that they were fine and didn't need the study session. As soon as Zac heard the doorknob turning, his eyes widened and he did his best to close the tab. But with impeccable timing, his computer suddenly did not want to cooperate with him. He panicked. It felt like there was nothing he could do, so he didn't move for those few seconds — though that brief interval felt like an eternity.

Therefore, Taylor walked in on his roommate fingering himself, gay porn playing on his laptop. Zac looked back at him, his face red and covered in a thin layer of sweat.

Taylor didn't say a word, didn't bother explaining why he had returned so much earlier than he had expected, didn't ask what the hell was going on. He just blinked hard, turned to walk out of the room, and shut the door behind himself.


	8. i’m (not) gay

As soon as Zac witnessed his roommate leave the room, he followed after him.

Well, he had to turn his laptop off, take his fingers out of his ass, pull his pants on, cover his hands in hand sanitizer, and _then_ he followed after him. He ran into the long hallway, seeing Taylor walking with his head down and hands in his pockets.

Zac saw Taylor turn the corner to walk down the stairs. The drummer stopped, debating whether or not to run after him. Walking from class to class was enough of a workout for him each week, but he decided to chase after his roommate anyway.

"Taylor!" Zac shouted as the older male exited the building, Zac following closely behind him. But Taylor didn't stop. He walked a little bit faster, not even bothering to look up from the ground.

So Zac shouted his name a second time. Finally, after it being called a _third_ time, Taylor stopped and turned around.

"What do you want?" He asked with his hands still buried in his pockets.

"I can explain," Zac choked out while panting, his chest heaving due to the short run.

"Are you gay?" Taylor asked with his arms crossed over his chest. Zac was surprised to see no look of bewilderment upon Taylor's face.

"No," Zac lied after a few seconds of hesitation. Taylor squinted.

"I just walked in on you with your fingers up your ass and gay porn playing on your laptop. You're at _least_ bisexual," Taylor said calmly. He appeared to be much more relaxed than Zac.

"I'm _not_ gay," Zac reiterated, even though he had no explanation for what he was doing watching gay porn and fingering himself. He didn't know much about straight people, but he knew damn well that straight men did _not_ do shit like that.

"I don't care if you're gay, Z. Stop lying to me."

Zac let out a small sigh and looked down at the ground, both of his hands coming to the back of his head. He wasn't good with coming out, few people knew about his sexuality. Although, he made it somewhat obvious with how he paid such close attention to his clothing and appearance, making him the stereotypical gay man. Also, his overall attitude was always so flamboyant that it didn't take much for people to pick up on it. The circle of people that knew of his homosexuality was limited to the few people back home he could call his friends, many of the people that knew him in high school, Hayley, and now Taylor.

"Fine, I'm gay," he admitted.

Even though Taylor knew it from the instant he walked into their room moments before, it was still weird to hear aloud. He suddenly felt very uncomfortable. As if Zac had been waiting to fuck him all along and was just waiting for the perfect opportunity. Even though this was actually what Zac wanted, he didn't have high hopes.

"So you lied to me?" Taylor asked, turning the situation to make it seem as though Zac was somehow at fault in this situation. Zac let out an exasperated sigh and rubbed his eyes.

"No, you never _asked_. Well, not directly at least."

Things began to make more sense. What Hayley and Zac had been talking about in the car that first night, why Zac wanted to join the school's "gay frat," why Zac was always opposed to the idea of hooking up with girls. Taylor was shocked that the realization hadn't hit him sooner.

This would take Taylor a while to understand. He had grown up in a religious household in the South and was taught in church to believe that everything in the Bible should be taken as correct and factual. In reality, he was not any less of a sinner than Zac was. All Zac was doing was what made him happy. Even though Taylor was having a difficult time wrapping his brain around this concept, he understood that Zac deserved happiness.

"Let's go back to our room," Taylor said. He walked towards the door, but stopped just before opening it. "You don't...look at my _stuff_ , right?"

Zac rolled his eyes. "You're not my type," he lied. Hopefully Taylor wouldn't catch on.


	9. started out with a kiss

Zac wished that he hadn't told Taylor of his sexuality because he noticed an immediate difference in behavior. Whenever Taylor would change, he would do his best to hide his body from Zac. He also seemed quieter than usual, not being as social with Zac as he normally would have been. It didn't take a genius to understand the reasoning behind his actions.

The Friday following the discovery of Zac's sexuality, Taylor didn't bother inviting Zac to his fraternity's party. He didn't even tell Zac where he was going until he was asked.

"Where are you going?" Zac asked, a slight frown on his face. Taylor paused.

"My frat is having a party tonight, uh..." he was contemplating whether or not to ask Zac if he would like to join him. He didn't want to be a dick and make it _obvious_ that he was excluding him, but he needed some more time away from Zac.

"I'll see you later," Zac said with a sigh. He knew that Taylor felt uncomfortable around him. They had started to _really_ form a solid bond and Zac had ruined it, or that was what he believed, at least.

Taylor walked to the frat house, which was not too far considering almost everything on campus was within walking distance from his dorm. He kept his hands in the pockets of his fleece jacket — which was not exactly providing enough warmth for the increasingly cold late October weather. This would only be the second frat party Taylor would attend, the first party he would be attending without Zac.

He didn't really know what to do. The only person he had really bonded with was Jon, but Taylor knew that the upperclassman most likely wouldn't want Taylor to be following him around all night like a puppy with separation anxiety.

The house was soon visible, the noise being heard from half a mile away. When he finally made it, he saw a familiar face standing in front of the house. He stared for a few seconds before he could remember the guy's name.

"You're Logan, right?" Taylor asked as he approached the other male. He flinched, his wide eyes focused on Taylor. Both of them were freshmen who had gone through the recent and painful process that was required in order to join the fraternity.

"Yeah," the fellow freshman responded, an accent present in his voice.

"Where are you from?" Taylor asked. Logan looked at Taylor with those same wide eyes that could be seen when he was initially approached.

"New Zealand," Logan replied. Taylor nodded his head.

"That's cool. Have you gone into the house?" Taylor asked. He received a quick head shake in response. Taylor looked at the house. "I don't really have anyone to talk to or hang out with tonight, think you and I could stick together?" Taylor asked, assuming that Logan was just as lonely as him, which was true. Logan smiled and nodded, still having only spoken three words to Taylor.

"Wait," Taylor said and raised his hand, removing his phone from his jacket. "Just give me your number. We can be friends now — and in case we lose each other in there."

Once they went through _that_ awkward process, they headed into the house. Once again, someone was standing in front of the door, though it did not appear to be the same person as it had been the week prior.

The two fraternity brothers were allowed inside and Taylor was immediately handed a shot by someone he had never seen before in his life. He downed the drink without a care for what could have been in it. After the week he had been through, he didn't care if it killed him.

After a half hour filled with raunchy dancing and a few awkward boners, Taylor and his new friend went to the kitchen together. A large-chested woman sat on the center counter, allowing men to take body shots from her. Taylor joined the fun, licking a line of salt from the stranger's neck, downing the shot (which had been neatly balanced between the woman's breasts — he was impressed), and then taking the lime from her mouth. If he were sober, he wouldn't have even considered doing such a thing. But with the amount of alcohol that was already coursing through his veins, he didn't care.

For some peculiar reason, Taylor did this several more times. If he weren't so intoxicated and could remember it the next morning, he would shame himself for partaking in such a grotesque activity.

But he was already at the point of forgetting it all.

In his drunken state, Taylor made the mistake of giving several random girls his number and _almost_ made the mistake of agreeing to joining a threesome — that would have involved another guy.

But in all honesty, Taylor was having the time of his life. Maybe he wouldn't remember any of the details by the next morning, but none of that mattered. In that moment, nothing mattered. He was subconsciously drowning his unnecessary sadness of having a gay roommate with dangerous amounts of alcohol and he loved every second of it.

With help from Logan, Taylor returned to his dorm and stumbled up to his room. Zac was wide awake, his lap holding his phone and a small bowl of mac-n-cheese.

When Taylor stumbled in, Zac said, "Hi," with a mouth filled with food. He swallowed. "How was your night?"

Taylor kicked off his shoes, rubbed his eyes, and ignored the question. He walked over to Zac, almost collapsing on top of him but placed both of his hands on Zac's shoulders to help with stability. He blinked a few times.

"Can I have some of that?" Taylor asked, his eyes focused on the unhealthy food that Zac was enjoying. Zac sighed but took a spoonful of the food and held it up. Taylor's mouth opened slowly and he leaned closer to take it into his mouth. He nodded once he swallowed the food.

"Thank you," he slurred.

The only logical explanation that Zac had for what happened next was that Taylor was _really_ thankful.

He leaned down a little bit and pressed his lips against Zac's. The tastes of cheese and liquor mingled to create the most disgusting and unique flavor that Zac had ever experienced. He forced Taylor away, eyes wide.

"Go to bed," Zac demanded. Taylor burped, smiled, and nodded. He didn't bother to even take his clothes off, just collapsing into bed to leave Zac to wonder what the fuck had just happened.


	10. we might as well just fuck

The following morning, Zac was awake before Taylor was. Zac had barely gotten any sleep due to the previous night's events. After the kiss, it had taken him half an hour to fall asleep and as soon as the sun had crept into his dorm room that morning, he was wide awake.

All he could think about was that damn kiss. And every time he looked at Taylor, the only thing he could focus on was his lips — well, and the drool that had formed in the corners of his mouth. It was difficult to ignore that.

Even though Taylor had been awake in his roommate's presence for less than five minutes the night prior, Zac knew that Taylor had definitely been wasted and that the hangover wouldn't be very fun to deal with. Zac left two unopened drinks next to Taylor's bed — one of Gatorade and one of water. He also left a little post-it note that read "drink up, sleepyhead :)"

Zac was unsure of what to expect. He thought that _maybe_ Taylor would remember the previous night's events, although he did not have high hopes. When Taylor woke up with a look of confusion evident upon his face, Zac knew for certain that his roommate didn't recall any of what had happened between them.

"When did I get back?" Taylor asked groggily. He tried to sit up but immediately felt the effects of his hangover and collapsed back onto his bed with a groan.

"Pretty late. You were wasted, as you can probably tell. What did you do last night?"

Taylor ignored the question, instead looking over at the beverages that Zac had left for him along with the little note. He smiled, looked up at Zac, and softly said, "Thank you."

Taylor was sober by noon, his hangover having passed by that time. Since it was only Saturday, that meant another party would be held by his fraternity that night. Even though he _should_ have learned his lesson from the previous night and the hangover he had faced, he didn't.

"Are you _sure_ you want to go? We can do stuff here. You were _really_ wasted last night," Zac said in an effort to persuade his roommate to stay in for the night. Taylor shook his head. Even though both of them realized that Taylor was not very good with alcohol and that he had little self-control after just one drink, neither of them said a word about it.

"I promised my friend that I would go with him. I won't be home as late, promise. Bye."

Taylor met with his new friend and walked to the party. If Taylor were to be completely honest with himself, he would admit that he was not even in the mood to party. He wanted to hang out in his dorm and eat microwavable popcorn. But he also wanted to fit in.

He ended up getting a bit more intoxicated than he had originally intended. Nothing as wild as the night before, he was just drinking the pain away — although he was not entirely sure _what_ that pain was.

Logan had not gotten nearly as drunk as Taylor. A short while after he noticed how drunk Taylor had become, Logan offered to walk him home. Taylor hesitated but ultimately accepted the offer. In reality, Taylor was exaggerating his drunkenness. There wasn't really any reason why, he just liked attention.

As they walked to the dormitory building that Taylor called his home, he began to ramble and say things that he would never say aloud if not under the influence. He was expressing feelings that, when sober, he would deny existed within him. But while in this intoxicated state, he knew himself better, even after having consumed just a _few_ drinks.

"Have you ever liked someone?" Taylor asked, stumbling over his own feet every once in awhile. He would laugh at himself each time this happened.

"Of course, why?"

"Okay, so let's just say I like someone. What if I _think_ they like me back but they might not? What do I do?"

Logan shrugged. "If you _really_ think she does, then it's worth a shot. Just hit on her and see how she takes it."

Taylor shook his head with a smile. Not because he disagreed with his friend's advice, but because she wasn't, well, a she.

"What if it's _not_ a girl?"

Logan opened his mouth to speak but didn't have anything to say. He had nothing against that, just didn't expect it to come from Taylor.

"Well, uh, still do the same thing, I suppose. Whatever makes you happy," he shrugged again.

There wasn't much else to say. Luckily, he didn't have to say another word. They had reached Taylor's dorm building and he decided that he would be able to make it up to his room on his own.

"Thanks for the help," Taylor said and placed both of his hands on Logan's face, squeezing the other male's cheeks before giggling and walking into the building.

He stumbled up the stairs and through the halls, eventually entering his room. Instead of making his way to his own bed, he immediately headed for Zac's bed.

Zac didn't say anything, just glanced up from his phone expressionlessly.

"How did you know you were gay?" Taylor asked, breaking the silence between the two of them. Zac's eyes widened.

"Uh, I-I always sort of knew, I guess. It became clear to me in high school, though, when I realized that I wasn't like most guys in my grade. I didn't like girls, I tried to force myself to, but with that, I realized that I _never_ liked them. I was always drawn to guys." It was weird. He knew he was gay and he knew that there was _no_ way he could do things with girls. But even though he had known this for so long, he didn't know how to explain _how_ he knew. He just...knew.

Taylor stared at him for a few seconds, looked away, and asked, "How would someone know if they were...bi?"

Zac blinked at his roommate a few times and then looked away, not knowing what to say. He barely knew how to explain the question about knowing his own sexuality, so how was he to help Taylor with this? He was definitely intrigued by these questions that Taylor was asking, considering that as far as he could tell, Taylor was interested in no longer living a heterosexual life. It was a good sign.

Zac shrugged. "Can you see yourself with someone of the same sex?"

Taylor looked up at him, a small pout upon his face. He didn't answer the question. Instead, he quickly leaned closer to Zac and connected their lips.

Zac didn't know what to do. This would be the second time that they had ever kissed, but this one surprised Zac just as much as the first time.

Taylor was the one to break the kiss, his lips parted and eyes half-lidded when the kiss came to an end.

"I think I want to fuck you, Zac," he whispered with a smile. Zac's eyes went wide and he didn't know what to say, mouth opening so he could speak, but having nothing come out.

After a few seconds, the only word he could come up with was, "Okay."


	11. this sex is on fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> smut warning

Even though Taylor was the one to initiate the intercourse, Zac was quick to demand, "Lie down."

Taylor did so with a lazy grin, climbing into Zac's bed and kicking his own pants off. He lay there with that smirk upon his face, wearing nothing but his shirt and boxers. A tent had begun to form in his boxer briefs, which definitely pleased Zac.

Zac joined his roommate on the bed, kneeling beside him. He leaned down, their lips meeting for what would be the third time since they met. His first action was unbuttoning Taylor's shirt, which he luckily received assistance in removing. As his lips mingled with Taylor's, he dragged his hand down the curly-haired boy's bare chest and stomach. His hand snuck under the waistband of Taylor's boxers, eventually gripping his semi-hard length. Taylor gasped and pulled away from Zac's lips.

"Feel good?" Zac asked somewhat rhetorically, his voice just a soft whisper. Taylor nodded, his cheeks flushed.

Zac's lips met the center of Taylor's chest, just between his pecs. Zac smirked against Taylor's skin as he left a trail of kisses along his chest and stomach. His hand continued its steady movement.

He pressed several kisses near the waistband of Taylor's boxers, stopping his hand to use it to join in on the effort of tugging the briefs down. Zac bit his lip before pressing another kiss to Taylor's stomach and leaving a line of kisses along his happy trail.

Zac's hand wrapped around Taylor's length once again, earning a whine from the older of the two. Taylor's eyes were shut and his mouth was wide open, although very few noises were passing his lips.

The steady movement of Zac's hand continued. He moved it up and down slowly, his thumb rubbing Taylor's tip each time it moved upwards.

Each time Zac's thumb ran along Taylor's tip, he took note of the pre-cum that had been forming upon it. As soon as Taylor opened his eyes and looked down at his roommate, Zac leaned closer and circled his tongue around the head of Taylor's cock. This caused a louder groan to leave the older male's lips.

A smile managed to appear on Zac's lips as he went down on Taylor, the younger man's head bobbing slowly. He moved his closed fist up and down, moving steadily along the area that Zac's mouth could not reach.

Zac pulled off, whispering, "You taste so good." Both of the men smirked, but shortly after, Zac went back down to run his tongue all the way up Taylor's hard length. This action caused another moan to leave the curly-haired brunet's pink lips.

Zac quickly tore off his own clothing, eager to get fucked. It had been a _long_ time since anyone or anything had been inside of him, with the exception of his own fingers, and he needed to get fucked.

Taylor felt a bit uncomfortable once his roommate removed the last of his own clothing, leaving himself entirely naked. Taylor just found it odd to be seeing another guy naked with the intent of fucking him.

Taylor's logic in this instance was simple: What was different about _this_ in comparison to fucking girls? Everyone has an ass, so it's no big deal.

Okay, maybe his logic wasn't exactly _logical_ , but it made sense to him.

Zac crawled off the bed and reached beneath it, pulling out the same bottle of lube that he had used when he had touched himself earlier in the week.

He was certain of one thing; Taylor had no idea what to do. So Zac decided that he wouldn't burden him with preparation, he'd get himself ready instead.

Zac joined Taylor on the bed and positioned himself between the other male's legs. He returned to his previous activity of going down on Taylor, bobbing his head.

While he did so, he propped himself up on his elbows and knees. Well, really just one elbow, because the other arm — two fingers of that hand covered in lube — reached towards his ass.

He glanced up at Taylor every few seconds, stopping the bobbing of his head once so he could force his middle finger into his entrance. It was quickly joined by his index finger, causing a groan to leave his lips. He looked back up at Taylor, continuing to bob his head as he prepared himself.

Once he decided that he was pretty much as ready as he would ever be, he removed his fingers, poured some more lube into his hand, and started to stroke Taylor's length. He slowly dragged his hand up and down, thumb circling around the tip just as it had done before.

Taylor had been silent — aside from a few sounds of pleasure that had escaped his lips — for the majority of this.

"You ready?" Zac asked eagerly. Before he even received an answer, he turned around so that he was facing away from Taylor.

But Taylor soon replied, nodding his head and then just barely getting out a quiet, "Yup."

So he kneeled behind Zac, making an effort not to look at him at all. Neither of them could believe that any of this was happening.

Taylor could feel his own cheeks heating up, the red pigmentation fueled by either embarrassment or nervousness — maybe both. Most others in Taylor's position would have viewed the sight of Zac on his hands and knees as a glorious one. Taylor was not like most others, though.

Although Taylor was beginning to have doubts about whether or not this was the right thing to do, he was too horny to stop what was about to happen. And although he was drunk, he wasn't drunk to the point where he wouldn't remember anything. He knew _exactly_ what he was doing. The fact that he was barely intoxicated was evident to Zac, but he decided against discussing it.

Taylor was very glad that Zac was not facing him, because that would have made the situation at hand _much_ more awkward. He looked down, cleared his throat, and very slowly eased himself into Zac.

Zac winced at the familiar pain. He had forgotten how different his own finger was than, well, _a dick._

While Zac adjusted to the pain, Taylor looked forward, his eyes fixated on a spot of chipped paint on the otherwise white wall ahead of them.

It was difficult for him to stay so calm when Zac felt so good. Against Taylor's will, a small moan left his own lips. He cleared his throat quickly after to act as though he wasn't enjoying this so much — but Zac had heard the moan, and he was quite proud of himself.

Taylor grunted occasionally, those small noises combining with Zac's whines, which were originally fueled by pain but transformed into moans of pleasure once Taylor hit _just_ the right spot.

"So...what are you doing this week?" Taylor asked. Yes, he was still making small talk _even_ while pounding his roommate. Zac furrowed his brows and turned his head as much as possible so he could look back.

"Are you _serious?"_ The younger male asked, causing Taylor to clear his throat again.

"Nevermind," Taylor quickly replied and went back to focusing on what he was doing. A much louder moan left Zac's lips, which caused Taylor to stop completely.

Zac looked back at him. "Don't _stop_ , idiot. Keep going," he demanded. Taylor complied and Zac whined, his head tilting back. _"Right there."_

Taylor had no idea what was happening. Why did Zac suddenly feel so good? Taylor had no clue. Nonetheless, he continued moving his body and made an effort to keep his hips angled the exact same way.

Taylor gasped when he suddenly felt as though he would reach his orgasm any second. He paused, panting as he stalled his hips. "I'm close, where should I --"

Zac cut him off and tilted his head, responding to Taylor by stating, "Finish inside of me. Wait, you're clean, right?"

Taylor rolled his eyes at the question. "Do you _really_ think I would be fucking you raw right now if I had something?"

There was a brief moment of silence, which was broken when Zac spoke. "Just finish inside," he repeated and looked ahead.

While one of Zac's arms supported his own upper body, the other reached between his legs and grasped his length. While Taylor neared his own release, hitting Zac's prostate with every single thrust, the younger male quickly stroked himself. He could feel his orgasm building up in his stomach.

First, Zac heard a grunt leave Taylor lips, the sound followed by a moan. Very shortly after, he could feel Taylor's release filling him. That was all Zac needed, the feeling being enough to push him over the edge.

He whined as he stroked himself a few more times, stopping once the result of his own orgasm could be found on his blanket.

Taylor eased out of Zac, collapsing onto the bed. Both of the boys were out of breath.

Zac cleared his throat. "I should probably clean this," he said as he stared at his cum-stained blanket. All Taylor did was nod in agreement.

He didn't feel like walking _all_ the way to the laundry room, so he instead simply removed the thick blanket and replaced it with a thinner one. He'd throw it in the wash in the morning. Maybe the thin blanket wouldn't be so great with the chilly weather, but it would work for the time being.

"I'm going to go shower. Uh...I'll be back soon," Zac said. Taylor didn't speak, just nodded his head. He had no words.


	12. little decoy

Taylor was so worn out that he fell asleep almost immediately after Zac left the room. Zac showered, since he felt disgusting following the sex between him and Taylor. It wouldn't have been _quite_ as bad if Taylor had worn a condom, but it was too late for that, obviously. Plus, as far as Zac knew, there were no condoms available at the time. Although, for all he knew, Taylor had a pile of unused condoms just waiting for him.

Taylor had fallen asleep in Zac's bed, because he was too tired to even stand up and walk to his own. Just Zac's thin blanket covered Taylor's bottom half, since he was _also_ too tired to put any clothes on. When Zac returned to their shared dorm room and discovered where Taylor had chosen to fall asleep, he smiled and walked over to him. He stared for a moment before walking away to get dressed into his pajamas.

Once Zac was clothed, he joined Taylor on the bed and curled up next to him, resting his head on Taylor's chest. The younger male listened to his roommate's steady heartbeat until they were both fast asleep.

—

The following morning, Taylor was the first to wake up. He was slightly confused to find Zac's resting body beside his own and to discover that, obviously, he had not slept in his own bed.

Taylor remembered the previous night, though. He remembered every last detail vividly. Surprisingly, he didn't regret it. Well, he didn't regret _all_ of it.

The curly-haired brunet made an effort to get out of bed, gradually pushing Zac's body off of his own. It took him five minutes just to get out of the bed. Luckily, Zac slept right through it.

When Taylor pushed himself to his feet, he spotted something by the door. He strolled over and leaned closer, lifting up a note that had been pushed beneath the door.

_You were really loud last night. Do whatever you want with whoever you want, but try your best not to disturb others. These walls are very thin. Please quiet down next time. And remember, stay safe. Sincerely, your RA, Jeremy._

In addition to the note, a condom could be found stapled to the paper.

"Well that's stupid," Taylor mumbled to himself as he ran his thumb along the metal staple, which had obviously put a hole in the condom, therefore rendering it useless. _Idiot_. Taylor wondered how that stoner had even made it into college, it was evident that he wasn't very bright.

Taylor heard some noise coming from the bed in which he had slept in. When he looked over, he saw Zac slowly pushing himself out of his messy bed. The younger male winced once he sat up on the bed. He was very sore, but he didn't regret it.

"How are you feeling?" Taylor asked, slowly walking over to his roommate and sitting down next to him. Zac shrugged.

"Not so bad. Hurts a little bit but it was worth it. Really just a lot of soreness. I haven't done that in a _really_ long time. Not with another person, I mean," he informed Taylor, who nodded in response. Then there was a brief interval of time where no words were shared between them.

Taylor felt inclined to say, "I'm not gay." This didn't surprise Zac.

"That's okay, I've been with bi guys before. Not a big deal."

Taylor quickly shook his head. "No, _no_. You don't get it. I don't like men."

Zac stared at him for a few seconds before letting out a laugh. "You literally fucked me in the ass last night and let me go down on you, T. I _think_ you like men. Nothing is wrong with that. Also, that doesn't mean you can't like girls. Like I said, you could be bisexual."

Taylor pushed himself off of the bed and to his feet, staring at Zac as he stood feet away, arms crossed over his own chest in an angry manner.

"That doesn't mean anything. It's not like _you_ fucked _me_. Girls have butts and mouths, I didn't do anything to you that I wouldn't be able to do to a girl."

"You saw my dick," Zac argued, still amused by Taylor's ignorance and denial of the obvious. Taylor shook his head.

"No — well, I did, but that doesn't mean anything. I'm straight," he replied, acting as though _all_ straight men stare at their friends' dicks and willingly fuck their male friends just for a good time. Just bros banging bros.

The smile that had appeared on Zac's lips during his amused laughter faded, his lips parted slightly as he stared up at his older roommate. "So you're saying that you used me to get laid? You led me on, you asshole. You made me believe that you _actually_ wanted me."

Taylor sighed and ran a hand through his messy, curly hair. He shrugged his broad shoulders. "I was drunk," he stated in an attempt to defend himself, even though he was barely intoxicated during the encounter. He was clearly in denial. Even though he had admitted his feelings to himself the previous night, he now told himself that those feelings had changed. He was just drunk, he wasn't thinking straight...no pun intended. He didn't mean the things he thought or said.

"You _used_ me," Zac repeated and pushed himself to his feet. He was fuming at that point.

"You should just go," Taylor said, as if this wasn't a dorm that they _both_ lived in.

Zac scoffed. "I live here too, dumbass. So no, I _won't_ go. Why don't _you_ go?"

Okay, Zac had a solid point. The roommates stared at one another for a few seconds, until Taylor stormed out of the room without another word. He slammed the door behind him to ensure that everyone on the floor knew that something was going on.

Considering how thin the walls were, their neighbors likely knew all about their little hookup.

Yeah, this would definitely be a _very_ fun year.


	13. just friends

Taylor did not return to their shared dorm room for hours. When he finally showed up, he was evidently high.

Or, as Logan had said, “baked like a fucking cake.”

Taylor reeked of weed and his red eyes made the fact that he was stoned more apparent. In addition to these factors, Taylor walked _straight_ to the mini fridge as soon as he entered the room. Evidently, the munchies were hitting him.

Once he finished off his nice snack — which was just an old, refrigerated quesadilla — he sat down on his own bed and looked at Zac with his bloodshot eyes. He cleared his throat until he finally caught Zac’s attention.

“So I was talking to Logan today. He and I decided that we’re gonna live together next year,” he spoke slowly.

Zac was silent, he simply stared at Taylor for a moment. Eventually, the only word he could muster up the courage to say was, “Why?”

Taylor shrugged in response. “I assume you wanted to live together next year but it's not like you and I ever discussed it. I didn't promise you that we would. Considering what took place last night and our weird conversation this morning, I don't know how good it would be for us to live together next year. That would make things _really_ awkward.”

“It was _one_ night,” Zac argued in an attempt to persuade Taylor to live with him during their sophomore year of college.

Again; Taylor shrugged. He didn't say another word.

Zac was devastated. He had no friends other than Hayley and Taylor, and only one of those two were even an option to be living with. Now that Taylor was planning on living with someone new, Zac was back to square one.

During another awkward silence that was shared between the men, Zac began to cry. All this did was worsen the awkward tension. It wasn't just a few tears rolling down his cheeks, it was full on ugly crying.

“Stop it. We've only been living with each other for a few months. We just need to get by until the end of the year,” Taylor said as if this would make Zac feel _any_ better. It did the opposite, causing him to cry even more.

He was an emotional guy, of _course_ he was sobbing. Taylor had no idea what to say, he just sat across from Zac and stared at him as he cried.

“Stop crying,” Taylor eventually said. Zac looked up at him, still crying, of course.

“I'm not like you, Taylor. I don't _have_ other friends. And I was _just_ starting to think that maybe you liked me. You know, I think you're doing all of this because you're in denial. You won't accept the truth that you _like_ me.”

Maybe Zac was becoming a little cocky in being so certain that Taylor was interested in him. But at the same time, he was right. Taylor did like him, even if he wouldn't accept his own feelings.

Obviously, Taylor instantly denied this accusation. “I don't like you. At least not as anything more than a friend. Last night was a mistake. We shouldn't have done what we did. We don't have a choice for this year, we have to live together until May, when we’re no longer freshmen. Unfortunately, I don't think that this will work for _another_ year. It's going to be really awkward, I think we can both agree on that. _Especially_ considering what happened between us last night.”

So that was that. Zac was heartbroken and Taylor didn't feel a thing but regret.

Regret that he had slept with Zac, regret that he had said those things and made Zac cry. He wished that he could take it all back.


	14. last resort

Zac knew that what he was planning would make him a bad person. He was positive of that. But that didn't stop him for a second. He also realized that the chances of this plan of his being successful were slim to none. Again, that did not stop him.

Taylor was at _another_ party that his fraternity was hosting, it being a boring Saturday night again. Therefore, Zac had the dorm entirely to himself. Instead of jerking off or something, he sat at his computer and typed away. (He had learned his lesson after being caught fingering himself). He was not on his laptop doing homework or writing an essay, no, not even close.

He was writing an advertisement on Craigslist. His diabolical plan included setting Taylor up with any woman who would respond to this sexual advertisement that he was working on. He wanted Taylor to realize that he was not interested in females. Maybe it wasn't the best idea, or even a decent one, but Zac had no clue what else to do. He knew that he was most likely setting himself up for failure, but he ignored that thought. For all he knew, Taylor was bi and liked men _and_ women, but maybe not. He wanted to stay optimistic.

He was stretching the truth just a _little_ bit in the ad.

Finally, he finished typing.

_"I'm looking for girls in the Manhattan area to hook up with. Preferably someone in college or around that age and you must be attractive. Seriously, girls only. No exceptions. Please contact me for more info."_

Now the waiting game would begin.

This waiting lasted _days_ , considering the majority of the messages were either scams or other men offering their services. Zac ignored all of these. Three days in, and he had received nothing that he wanted. The only messages he had gotten from _real_ women were unattractive old ladies who were in desperate need of love.

So Zac posted another ad. This time, he copied the previous advertisement but added an impressive bulge pic that he had found online and included "Interested in trying BDSM" at the end of the message.

This proved to be successful. The messages poured in almost immediately.

Throughout that day, he received plenty of real responses to this ad. He ignored the spam and gay guys looking for a good time and focused on the _actual_ women that replied. (Not the old ladies, though). He ultimately decided on an attractive young woman named Baylie who was _also_ attending NYU. Zac thought that it was a perfect match, but hopefully Taylor would not think the same thing.

Now he would have to properly plan this out.

**Zac:** _hey, I saw you responded to my Craigslist advertisement. Interested in a good time? ;)_

Zac hadn't even typed much but he was already beginning to regret it. No stopping now, though. He sent the email.

**Baylie:** _I sure am looking for a good time, sweetheart ;) I'm glad you got back to me. think we could meet up this week?_

Zac felt extremely ashamed. Not because of his evil plan to expose Taylor's true sexuality, but because he was flirting with a _girl_.

**Zac:** _I'm pretty busy for the next few days, but how does Friday work for you?_

**Baylie:** _Sounds perfect, hottie ;)_

So, Baylie and Zac scheduled to meet on the afternoon of the upcoming Friday. The two would meet in public, specifically at a park on campus. Zac wasn't positive that any of this was going to work out, considering he had blatantly lied throughout the entirety of the advertisement that he had posted. Not only that, but he had lied _directly_ to Baylie. Hopefully he could persuade her.

—

That Friday, when Baylie and Zac met, the girl was a bit surprised over Zac's appearance. He was cute, but not exactly what she had had in mind.

Before Baylie could even introduce herself, Zac spoke.

"Hi, I'm Zac. Look, I know this isn't what you came here for but I'll _pay_ you."

Baylie was already confused. But she stayed silent. She assumed that Zac thought she was someone else and believed she was some sort of prostitute.

"So I think my roommate is gay. But the problem is, he won't admit it. I'll pay you to hit on him and help him realize that he _is_ gay."

There was a silence between them, the tension being broken when Baylie said, "Wait...what?" She was very confused, why didn't Zac just tell her this in the beginning?

Zac explained the dilemma once again. The girl was confused as to how this would help Zac to discover his roommate's sexuality, but he explained that he was out of ideas. This was his last resort.

Well, more like he couldn't think of anything better to do. He had no plan B.

"How does, uh, fifty dollars sound?" Zac asked as he removed his wallet from his back pocket. Baylie stared at him for a few seconds. If she was going to do this, she wanted to be paid a good amount of money.

"One hundred," she demanded. Zac's eyes went wide.

"Seventy-five," he retorted. Baylie just shook her head.

"No, one hundred dollars or you can find someone else."

Zac let out a sigh as he pulled out two fifty dollar bills and handed them over. He knew better than to continue arguing with her about how much money she deserved.

The girl stuffed the money into her pocket and then asked, "Do I at least get to know what this guy looks like? Or how I'll find him? Or his name? I need something to work with."

"His name's Taylor, he's in that Zeta Psi frat and will probably be at the party tomorrow night. I'll show you what he looks like," Zac said as he went onto his phone and scrolled through his photos. He found a picture of the two of them, zoomed in on Taylor, and showed Baylie the photograph.

Her eyes widened a bit and she nodded in approval. "Alright," she said. "It was nice, uh, doing business with you. I'll be sure to look for Taylor at the party tomorrow night."

Before she could leave, her and Zac exchanged phone numbers so that they could communicate later on. Once that was taken care of, they said their goodbyes and parted ways. Now Zac could only hope for the best. He had just met Baylie, so for all he knew, she could have been planning to take his money and do none of what he had paid her to do. Unfortunately, though, he had no other options. He liked Taylor too much to let him slip away without a fight.


	15. loveless generation

Zac sat in Hayley's apartment as an episode of _Rugrats_ played on her television. They weren't paying much attention to the show, though. Instead, they were discussing Zac's evil plan that he hoped would somehow cause Taylor to fall in love with him.

"I can't believe she's _actually_ doing it," Hayley said with a laugh and a shake of her head. She was referring to Baylie, who had agreed to hit on Taylor even though there was nothing in it for her. Well, nothing except one hundred dollars.

"I hope she actually does it," Zac said with a shrug.

"You know I hope that Taylor comes to his senses, but how is this going to help that happen?" Hayley asked her younger friend. Zac looked up at her and shrugged a second time.

"Maybe he'll just realize that he doesn't feel the same way about her. And trust me, she's a good looking girl. Not my type because she's not a dude, but definitely someone that a straight guy would want to get with. What I hope happens is that she will be all over him, but Taylor won't reciprocate any of those feelings. In turn, he'll discover that he actually likes men, which I hope includes me."

Hayley slowly nodded her head. Zac knew that the idea was far-fetched, but again, he had no other ideas and no other options.

"So how will you know if it goes as planned?" Hayley asked.

"Well, I'm hoping Baylie will text me and let me know what's going on," Zac explained. A few minutes later, the text that he had been waiting for came through.

**Baylie:** _I see Taylor. I'm gonna approach him, he's drinking and hanging out with a few other guys. I'll let you know how it goes._

Zac anxiously waited for more information pertaining to how the night was going between Taylor and the girl that Zac had found through Craigslist. Considering he had paid her one hundred dollars, he really hoped that she would do as he had asked.

Another half hour went by without a word as to what was going on. Zac anxiously texted Baylie.

**Zac:** _Please tell me you talked to him or something_

And _another_ half hour slowly ticked by. Finally, at exactly 12:01 AM, Zac's phone vibrated.

"Is it her?" Hayley asked unenthusiastically. Waiting around for the last hour hadn't been very entertaining. Zac nodded.

**Baylie:** _Sorry, I didn't see your text. I just got out of the party. It went well._

Zac was instantly relieved. Baylie's answer had been so vague, but just knowing that the night went well was very reassuring.

**Zac:** _So? What did he say? Did he turn you down and admit that he's gay?_

**Baylie:** _Well, it went well for me. Maybe not for you._

Zac's heart sank. His eyes went wide as he stared at the screen. He could feel his hands shaking.

Hayley wanted to know why Zac's reaction had changed so suddenly. She looked over his shoulder, her eyes going wide as well as soon as she read Baylie's response. Zac couldn't formulate a response, just stared at his phone.

**Baylie:** _I promise I tried. I did exactly as you told me to do. I flirted with him, that's all you asked me to do. I even went the extra mile and asked him if he was gay, which was a little awkward. He looked surprised and then a little insulted. I'm really sorry it didn't work out._

Zac sighed as he read the message. Hayley frowned and rested her head on her best friend's shoulder.

**Zac:** _Thanks for trying. How'd he react when you hit on him?_

**Baylie:** _He didn't hesitate to flirt right back. If it's an indication of how much he enjoyed my flirtation, he's walking me home right now._

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me," Zac mumbled to himself. He could not even respond to the text, he had nothing to say.

Zac set his phone down on Hayley's couch, grabbed one of her throw pillows, pressed his face into it, and screamed into said pillow. He angrily tossed it across the room. Hayley had no choice but to stand up and force him to sit back down. She feared he would go ahead and ruin her television, especially considering the pillow had flown by the TV, missing the device by mere inches.

"He's never gonna accept himself. He's probably just a stupid, homophobic hillbilly. He _fucked me,_ Hayles. He won't just face it, he won't face the fact that he is at _least_ bi."

Hayley let out a sigh. "Just because he flirted with that girl doesn't mean he doesn't like you in that way. Like you said, he could be bi. You know that bisexual guys like girls, right? I need to be honest with you, Z, I don't know _how_ you thought this idea was going to work."

Zac rolled his eyes. He knew that his plan was not a very clever one, he didn't need Hayley to remind him of that.

"Give me a better idea then. Give me something better to do to make Taylor realize his sexuality," Zac said angrily.

Hayley sighed and shook her head. "I don't know, I really don't. I'm sorry. I don't think there's anything you can do. I think he might just be bisexual and even if he is into you, he might be in denial. Plus, that doesn't mean he doesn't like girls," she spoke softly.

Even though Zac was fuming, he had nothing to say. Hayley heard the door of her apartment opening so she slowly walked away from Zac. In walked her roommate, who also happened to be her girlfriend. The two walked closer to one another, their lips connecting for a quick kiss.

"Hey, Lindsey, I know I promised that you and I could spend some more time together tonight but Zac ended up staying longer than I had expected," she whispered, glancing back at her male friend.

"I can hear you!" he shouted from the couch, his arms crossed over his chest as if he was a toddler who was put in timeout for misbehaving.

Lindsey gave her girlfriend a smile and shook her head. "It's okay. I'm gonna go get changed," she said quietly and gave Hayley a kiss on the forehead.

Hayley took a seat beside Zac once again, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. "It's gonna be okay. I hope he comes to his senses and realizes what he's missing out on."

Zac sighed. "I hope so too."


	16. hurricane love

Taylor’s denial was so strong that he _really_ believed he was straight. Anytime he would find himself feeling any attraction towards a fellow male, he would convince himself that he didn't _really_ like them in that way, that would be just absurd.

He liked being hit on, so when Baylie had initially made a move on him, he wasn't against it. He loved being complimented, it didn't matter who the compliments were coming from.

Something felt different, though. He ended up asking Baylie on a date a few days after they had met. Almost every time they spoke, their conversations took a turn where they would somehow become sexual. Taylor had a very strong feeling that their date would result in some rough sex.

Since they were freshmen in college, and therefore were below the age required to legally drink or attend most clubs, their options _should_ have been limited. Luckily for them, Baylie knew of someone who was able to make fake IDs.

“Have you ever been to a club?” Baylie asked Taylor as the two stood in line on that cold Friday night, waiting to enter the club. They stood next to each other awkwardly, holding hands and rarely looking at one another. They both felt that the hand holding was awkward and unnecessary but neither of them spoke up about that.

“Nope, never. What about you?” Taylor asked. The conversation was clearly not going anywhere. Once they had a few drinks in their system, though, it would be a very different story.

“Nope,” Baylie responded. Taylor nodded his head. It was difficult to even focus on the girl when he was so worried about being caught with a fake ID.

When Taylor and Baylie approached the bouncer and handed over their fake IDs, they didn't have any issues. Taylor’s blatant nervousness made the illegal activity more obvious. Fortunately, the bouncer couldn't turn someone away for being awkward, so he just gestured for the two of them to head into the club. They immediately did so.

They found a booth and wasted no time in sitting down, making out, and feeling each other up. Taylor stopped abruptly.

“I'm gonna go get us some drinks, do you have any preference?” Taylor shouted over the loud music.

“Get us shots!” Baylie requested with a smile.

Taylor returned to their table a few minutes later with four shots, two in each hand. He wasn't an expert when it came to alcohol. Aside from beer, he didn't drink much. If they had something other than beer at the fraternity parties that he would attend, then he would have some of that. But otherwise, he would stick to the boring stuff.

“What did you get?” Baylie asked.

“Straight vodka shots,” Taylor informed her. Maybe that wouldn't have been the first beverage she would pick when it came to shots, but beggars can't be choosers.

They clinked their small glasses together before downing the alcohol at the same time. Taylor squinted as he felt the burn of the vodka slipping down his throat. He coughed afterwards, shaking his head a little bit. Baylie, on the other hand, appeared to be completely unaffected by the alcohol.

“Let's do another one!” Baylie shouted excitedly. Taylor shrugged his shoulders and agreed to do so, considering he had purchased four shots for the two of them.

So they both took a second shot, and then ordered more for themselves. They each took a third, and eventually they had both downed four shots of vodka each and were making out in the booth of the club in which they had illegally entered.

“I want you to fuck me,” Baylie ended up whispering against Taylor’s lips.

Considering how loud it was in the club, Taylor had to yell, “What?” Baylie repeated herself, basically screaming into Taylor’s ear. His eyes widened as soon as he heard those words. Even though that had been what Taylor was anticipating, it came as a shock to hear it aloud.

“Let's get out of here,” Taylor yelled to her over the music. They quickly left the club and immediately ordered an Uber to bring them back to campus.

“Where should we go?” Taylor asked. “My roommate is back at my dorm. He's gay so I don't think he would enjoy watching us fuck,” he explained with a laugh. Baylie laughed awkwardly, considering she knew _exactly_ who Taylor’s roommate was.

“My roommate is at some guy’s apartment tonight. We can have fun _all_ night if you want,” Baylie said with a smile.

“Sounds perfect,” Taylor whispered with a smirk and pressed a kiss to her lips.

They found the car that would be driving them, which brought them back to Baylie’s dorm building. They wasted no time at all in getting naked — except for their underwear, or, in Baylie’s case, except for her bra and underwear — and making out in her twin-sized bed.

The night was going by too quickly. It was all a drunken blur. First, Baylie was just feeling him up through his boxers, then she was giving him a handjob, and then she was going down on him.

Eventually, Baylie’s completely nude body was underneath Taylor’s. The couple were making out, continuing to feel each other up.

Baylie whispered, “Fuck me,” and nibbled on Taylor’s ear. The gesture alone was hot, but Taylor began to feel anxious. He cleared his throat, rested on his knees, and prepared himself to do exactly as Baylie had requested. But just as he was about to push into her, he crawled out of Baylie’s bed.

“What are you doing?” she asked, sitting up in her bed.

Taylor turned his back away from her as he removed the condom from around his dick and clothed himself. When he turned around, Baylie could see that his eyes appeared to be tearing up.

“What's your problem?” she asked bitterly.

“I can't do this. I'm sorry. You're a beautiful girl, really. I just can't do this.”

Baylie tried to stop him, but before she could, Taylor was out the door.

In the most dramatic way possible, Taylor just ran. He ran in the direction that he hoped would lead him to his dorm building. It took him much longer to make it to his dorm room than he had anticipated, but he finally showed up at half past 12. He was a panting, sweating mess at that point. Once he returned to his room, he needed to take a moment to catch his breath before speaking.

Zac stared at him the entire time with wide eyes.

Although his face was flushed, Taylor spoke once he had caught his breath for the most part.

“Zac, I know I was stupid. But I was about to fuck a girl tonight and realized that I just can't do it. Listen, I think I need you to fuck me _just_ to be sure.”

That was an odd request. What did he expect that to prove? “Well, I knew I was gay before I ever had sex. So if you're _really_ gay, you should probably know it already. Are you sure you're not bisexual or anything?”

Hayley had definitely knocked some sense into Zac when she brought up the fact that Taylor could have just been a raging bisexual. He didn't know why he hadn't considered that beforehand.

Taylor shrugged. “I don't know, man. Maybe I like both, maybe I only like guys, or maybe I'm overthinking it and _only_ like girls.”

Zac let out a sigh. He didn't want to waste his time, but he also _really_ wanted Taylor. “Alright, just let me fuck you and then you'll see from there.”


	17. all i wanted was you

**warning: smut**

Taylor lay down nervously on Zac's bed, no clothing on the older male's body, with the exception of a pair of tight boxer briefs. He was on his stomach, facing away from Zac.

"Are you _sure_ you want to do this?" Zac asked his roommate, who nodded in response.

"You've never done this before, right?" he asked. To this, Taylor turned his head around so he could look at Zac.

"That was the stupidest question you've ever asked," Taylor replied with a straight face. Zac blushed, already feeling like an idiot.

Zac let out a heavy breath as he joined Taylor on the bed. Zac was fully clothed, while Taylor was closer to being fully nude.

"Just tell me if I'm getting too rough or anything, okay?" Zac requested. The older of the two nodded again.

Doing this was slightly out of Zac's comfort zone. He was accustomed to bottoming and being ordered around, which was something that he enjoyed. He had topped before, just had never been too good at it. He was inexperienced when it came to that. But this was what Taylor wanted.

"Okay, flip onto your back," Zac requested. Taylor flipped over, unintentionally showing off the tent present in his boxers. Although he was nervous, he was also excited.

Zac tugged Taylor's boxers down his legs, the older male assisting by lifting his hips slightly.

"Are you _sure_ you want to bottom?" Zac asked as soon as he removed Taylor's clothing.

"Jesus Christ, Zac, I already told you. _Yes_ , I'm sure," he reiterated. Zac frowned after hearing his roommate's response.

"Okay, but you don't need to bring Jesus into this," Zac mumbled in response. Considering they were about to fuck, he didn't exactly want to be thinking about Jesus. It wasn't much of a turn on.

Zac pressed his lips between Taylor's pecs and sloppily kissed down his chest. Meanwhile, his hand moved down much quicker. His hand was soon wrapped around Taylor's length. In response to this, the only thing that Taylor did to indicate that he was experiencing pleasure was let out a heavy sigh. When Zac glanced up, he noticed that his roommate's eyes were closed and that his face was tilted towards the ceiling.

Zac pressed a few more kisses along the older male's chest and stomach before his mouth replaced his hand. His tongue ran along the underside of Taylor's cock before swirling around the tip. He didn't do much more, soon pulling off of Taylor, which caused him to lift his head and open his eyes.

Zac quickly removed his clothing so that he could join Taylor in being fully nude. The two of them looked into one another's eyes for a moment before Taylor cracked a smile, which caused the younger male to smile as well.

"You're an idiot," Zac commented. Taylor said nothing in return, just kept that grin on his face.

The curly-haired male expected Zac to return to what he had been doing just before their brief interruption. The back of his head met the bed once more. Much to his surprise, he soon felt his legs being spread. He looked up as soon as he noticed this, and by then he could feel Zac's tongue running along his entrance. Taylor whined at the unfamiliar feeling, enjoying it much more than he had expected himself to.

Zac continued to run his tongue along the older male's entrance while his hand stroked his length. This quickly became a lot for Taylor to handle, causing him to whine beneath Zac's touch. Zac eventually stopped and pulled away, shaking his head with a smile.

"Why'd you stop?" Taylor questioned with a frown.

"My tongue alone isn't going to be enough," Zac explained. Taylor's eyebrows rose, cueing Zac to continue his explanation of what was going to happen. "Well, I wanna fuck you. So to prepare you, I need to finger you. Actually, I don't _need_ to, but I don't think you'll enjoy it otherwise." It baffled Zac that Taylor had so little knowledge when it came to gay sex. He had to keep in mind that not everyone knew so much about this topic.

Taylor's eyes had gone wide as soon as being fingered was mentioned. "Like, your fingers... _in_ me?" he asked for clarification. Zac rolled his eyes.

"If you _really_ want me to fuck you, fingers shouldn't be a big deal."

Taylor let out a sigh. "Fine," he whispered. "Should I stay positioned like this?" he asked. His legs were beginning to cramp, so he wasn't so sure if this was going as planned. Zac just nodded in response to the question.

The younger brunet retrieved his hidden bottle of lube and placed it down on his mattress. Before he would get to work, he wanted to be sure that Taylor was experiencing pleasure.

He returned to his previous actions, his tongue running along Taylor's entrance, this action followed by the tip of his tongue circling around it.

Taylor was a whining mess, even more so by the time Zac stopped. But it needed to be done. The younger of the two lathered his right index finger in the clear lubrication, also applying an ample amount to his roommate's entrance.

"Are you ready?" Zac asked, receiving a nod. "On the count of three. One, two...."

Without even giving him that last number, he forced his finger into Taylor's tight entrance. Taylor gripped the bedsheets and let out a loud groan due to the instant discomfort.

"Sh, sh. Remember? The walls are _very_ thin," Zac said softly as he started to move his finger in and out.

"You _enjoy_ this? You're a psycho!" Taylor exclaimed, his mouth then covered by Zac's free hand.

"Shut up. People are sleeping."

Taylor stared at Zac with wide eyes, but did not protest. He simply stayed there, legs spread and ass in pain.

With no warning of what was to come, Taylor felt Zac's digit being pulled out of him. He winced due to the removal.

He didn't say another word, just watched Zac as he covered his index finger in lubrication again, but this time his middle finger as well. More of the cool gel was applied to Taylor's entrance before two of Zac's digits entered him. The burning sensation continued, his face red as he resisted the urge to scream.

Taylor was waiting for some kind of pleasure to kick in, but he had no idea how _anyone_ could experience pleasure from this activity. Suddenly, though, the pleasure hit him. Zac's fingers had curled and met Taylor's prostate perfectly, causing the older male to moan out. Still, the pain was much stronger than any sense of pleasure. But maybe, just _maybe_ , he would get used to it.

Taylor experienced intense pain once more when Zac removed his fingers.

"Come on," Zac said, which caused Taylor to quirk a brow.

"What?" he asked.

"Suck my dick," Zac demanded, keeping a straight face following his words. Taylor tried to keep a straight face as well, but he began laughing after a few seconds. Zac joined him in this.

"Don't try to be dominant," he said with a laugh.

"Shut up, I tried," Zac said, his cheeks red from blushing. He suddenly stopped laughing. "But seriously. Do it."

Taylor's laughter faltered as well.

"You're serious?"

"No, I'm just playing an _awesome_ joke on you," he said sarcastically.

"But...I don't know how," Taylor claimed. That was a lie. He'd received enough blowjobs and watched _more_ than enough porn to know how to give head.

"Then I'll give you tips as you do it."

"But I have a bad gag reflex," he argued, formulating excuse after excuse.

"Fine, you don't need to," Zac finally said. Taylor frowned and gave in.

"Alright, should I get on my knees and you'll stand up?" he asked. Zac was surprised that Taylor _actually_ agreed to do it.

"Uh, sure, yeah. I guess."

Taylor nervously crawled out of Zac's bed and kneeled in front of him.

"This is so weird," he said before taking Zac's length into his hand, stroking him for a moment. Taylor leaned forward and tried to take in the entirety of Zac's length into his mouth, quickly gagging and pulling away.

When he looked up, he saw Zac laughing at him. "You're getting too eager," Zac said and gave Taylor a pat on the shoulder. "Slow down."

So Taylor let out a sigh, continued with stroking Zac's cock, and wrapped his lips around the younger male's tip. He sucked on Zac's head as his hand stroked his shaft. For the second time, Taylor tried to impress Zac by taking in as much as possible. And for the second time, he failed.

Eventually, Zac decided to give Taylor a break. Besides, this was not getting him very aroused. "Get on the bed," Zac said, which Taylor did not hesitate to do. Soon, Zac found himself positioned between Taylor's legs, their eyes locked.

"Why is it salty?" Taylor asked, his questions making him a bit of a nuisance at this point. Zac quirked a brow, confused as to what Taylor was referring to.

"Why is _what_ salty?" Zac asked.

Taylor hesitated before blurting out, "Your dick."

Zac's look of confusion faded after a moment, a smile forming on his lips. "I don't know, T. I think you'll have to ask a scientist about that."

The younger of the two grabbed his lube and first covered Taylor's entrance in it. He then coated his own length in the gel, letting out a sigh over the coolness of it.

"You ready?" Zac finally asked. Taylor shook his head.

"Not really, no. But do it anyway. I need to get this over with."

Finally, Zac eased himself into Taylor. The older boy let out a whine, his face contorting into an expression fueled by pain.

"Don't move, _please_ don't move," Taylor begged, lifting his hands to cling onto Zac's shoulders. Taylor's legs wrapped tightly around his roommate's hips, holding him close. Fingers alone hadn't been enough to fully prepare Taylor for this.

The two of them stayed in this position for another moment, neither of them speaking. Finally, Taylor decided to break the silence.

"Okay, just do it. Get it over with," he said.

"Just because you don't like this doesn't mean you don't like guys, you know. Maybe you only like to top. I knew I was gay even before I lost my virginity," Zac said with a frown.

"Just _fuck_ me," Taylor demanded, his eyes wide.

Zac nodded his head and complied. He eased himself almost completely out before pushing his length back in fully.

This continued for a few more minutes, although Zac began to move his hips at a faster pace. It was awkward, considering Zac had little knowledge when it came to being a top. He had always been used to being the bottom and doing less work, so maybe his thrusting and other actions could have been better.  Zac was failing in fighting back moans while Taylor was fighting back complaints. 

By this point, Taylor felt certain that pleasure was not a possibility. He didn't know why he was able to experience pleasure in their earlier activity but not during this one.

It blew his mind that anyone could actually enjoy this painful activity. Just after he had accepted that this would not be pleasurable in the least, Zac was able to find his prostate. Taylor moaned immediately.

Zac chuckled over the sudden change of emotion from Taylor. His eyes rolled back, his back arched, and his hand trailed down his body to wrap around his length.

He didn't know why he hadn't began touching himself sooner, especially considering the previous lack of pleasure. That didn't matter now, though.

His hand moved quickly. That, combined with the pleasure from Zac hitting his prostate perfectly with each thrust of his hips, was helping him to feel as though he would cum any second. The events unfolding did not only turn Taylor on further, but also raised the arousal of Zac. He loved to please people sexually, even if that usually meant him being the bottom. But in this instance, as he pounded into Taylor and watched the curly-haired boy experience euphoria, he was just as satisfied as he would be if he were bottoming. The feelings that Zac experienced from Taylor tightening around him even more than usual did not help him in delaying his orgasm.

Before Taylor could finish, he heard Zac's voice. "I'm close. Where should I...?"

Taylor panicked. "I, uh, um...on my chest," he quickly said. Zac nodded, pulled himself out of Taylor, and finished on his chest.

Meanwhile, though, Taylor was still stroking himself. He could feel his orgasm in the pit of his belly, but Zac decided to help him out by wrapping his lips around the tip of Taylor's cock. It would just make the clean up process easier.

This was enough to push Taylor over the edge. He finished in Zac's mouth, surprised to see that the younger male swallowed every last drop of his release.

Once Taylor was finished, Zac sat beside him. His index finger ran through the white release that covered Taylor's chest. This action was followed by Zac lifting his finger and holding it up to Taylor's mouth.

"What?" Taylor asked.

"Suck my finger," Zac replied. With a sigh, Taylor took Zac's digit into his mouth and swirled his tongue around it. He wasn't too fond of the taste, but it was bearable.

Finally, Zac collapsed in his bed beside Taylor.

"You should clean that up," he said, pointing to the cum that covered Taylor's chest. He shrugged in response.

"Maybe later."

After fifteen minutes of sitting there, Taylor _finally_ cleaned himself up and clothed himself in a pair of boxers, as did Zac. The two of them lay in bed together, curled up to each other. It felt right.


	18. you know how to make a boy feel warm

"So how do you feel?" Zac asked his roommate. Following the question, Taylor let out a small sigh.

"Well, I'm sore now. Tired, too. What about you?" he asked, having misunderstood the question.

Zac shook his head. "No, I don't mean physically. I mean how do you feel about the whole sexuality thing? Do you think you know? Or are you still confused and uncertain?"

"Oh, well, I don't know. I mean, I think as time has gone on in my life, I've liked girls less and less. I feel like I've always forced myself to, just because it's always been viewed as the norm, especially having grown up in Tennessee. When I was going to fuck Baylie, everything about it felt wrong. I don't know what I am, maybe I won't label myself at all. But what I do know is that I had a _lot_ of fun with you tonight," Taylor explained with a smile. Zac reciprocated the expression, clinging to Taylor as he did so.

"Do you think you want to, I don't know, _date?"_ Zac asked nervously. He immediately regretted asking the question.

Taylor let out a sigh. He had expected that to be brought up. He was unsure of what to say, considering _he_ wasn't even sure of his sexuality just yet.

"I don't know yet. I'm tired and I need time to think about this," Taylor replied. Even though Zac just wanted to be with him already, he understood that Taylor would need time. It would be better to let him have the time he wanted than to pressure him into a relationship.

—

Taylor woke up first the following morning. He looked down at Zac and let out a sigh as he watched the boy sleep.

He pushed himself out of bed and immediately picked up his phone to call Logan, who he had been planning on living with during their sophomore year.

Logan picked up instantly. "Morning," Logan said in his charming Kiwi accent.

"Hey, I need to talk to you about our living situation next year. Is it okay if someone else lives with us too?" Taylor asked, doing his best not to wake his current roommate up.

"Sure. I don't care. I think we're supposed to have three or four people living together next year, us included, if we plan on living off-campus as we've discussed. It's better to live with someone that one of us knows than to live with a stranger. Who do you want to join us?"

"My roommate, Zac. He's a good guy. When I told him about my plans to live with you next year, he seemed really bummed. You can meet him if you want. I haven't exactly discussed this with him yet, but I assume he'll have no problem with living with us."

"Okay. Sounds good," Logan replied simply, not at all picky with who he was living with. If Taylor thought that Zac was a good roommate, then he must have been exactly that. "I'm okay with meeting him. Anything else you wanted to talk about?" Logan asked, hoping that the answer would be no.

"Nope, that's it. Bye," Taylor said, hanging up the phone after Logan had said a goodbye as well.

Zac slept right through the conversation. Taylor did not let him sleep for much longer, though. He climbed into Zac's bed and began pressing kisses to the younger boy's neck.

Confusion filled Zac's mind when he felt someone hovering above him and a pair of lips connected to his neck, but he experienced a wave of relief when he discovered that that person was just Taylor. He relaxed with a smile upon his lips. Once Taylor noticed that Zac had awoken, he sat up. Still, though, he was above Zac. Specifically, he was in Zac's lap.

"So, I just got off the phone with Logan," Taylor explained, grinning. "I asked him if he's okay with you living with us next year. He's fine with it. If you want to, that is..." he trailed off, hoping that Zac would give him a positive answer.

The younger male's eyes went wide. "Are you sure? Logan doesn't have a problem with me living with you and him?" he asked.

"Nope, he doesn't mind one bit. He'd rather live with someone that one of us knows than live with a total stranger."

"I'd love to live with you two next year," Zac said happily. They smiled at one another before Taylor worked up the courage to lean down and press his lips to Zac's. Still, though, Zac managed to slightly smile throughout the kiss, a stupid grin on his face once Taylor pulled away.

There was a silence that followed, although it was broken by Zac when he asked, "Wanna fuck again?"

Taylor chuckled in response to Zac's important question. He didn't expect that.

"I don't know, I'm pretty tired. I don't know about full on sex but how about some foreplay?" Taylor asked.

Zac squinted at the curly-haired boy. "But foreplay is for before sex. That's why the 'fore' part is in it. So are we fucking or not?"

Taylor rolled his eyes. "Why do you have to ruin the moment?" he asked rhetorically. "I just mean if we _were_ to have sex, the stuff we'd do beforehand."

He didn't know why this was such a difficult concept for Zac to comprehend. After a few seconds, the younger male slowly nodded his head.

"Alright, do you want to go first?" Zac asked.

"As in me getting off first or me getting you off first?" Taylor asked.

"The first one," Zac said, somewhat annoyed with how complicated Taylor was managing to make this. The older of the two shrugged his shoulders in response.

"I don't want to be selfish," Taylor said with a frown. Zac sighed and ran a hand through his dark hair.

"Shut up. Just lie down and I'll suck your dick."

Well that was rather direct. With a grin, Taylor immediately relaxed in Zac's bed. It was a bit odd that they had never done anything in Taylor's bed, but that was insignificant. What was important, though, was Zac and Taylor's current activity.


	19. guys being dudes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: smut

"That feel good?" Zac asked his roommate as he touched the older male through his boxers. Taylor shook his head.

"Stop teasing," he requested, disliking the lack of direct contact.

"Ask nicely," Zac requested, as if he had any control in the situation.

Taylor let out a sigh. He wasn't going to give in and let Zac win. "If you don't stop teasing, I won't touch _you."_

Understandable. Zac pursed his lips and replied, "Okay, I see how it is."

He removed Taylor's clothing, revealing the man's length. Zac wasted no time whatsoever, instantly wrapping his hand around the older male's cock. Zac smiled up at him.

"Why are you smiling? Don't be creepy," Taylor commented.

"I'm just happy," Zac replied. Due to those words, a smile crept up on Taylor's face as well.

"Shut up," the curly haired boy said with an eye roll. Yet, his smile still remained.

Zac took those words as a cue to get to business. His tongue ran along the underside of Taylor's length, earning a moan from the older brunet.

Zac then took just the tip into his mouth, though he soon thereafter allowed almost the entirety of Taylor's length into his mouth.

As Taylor felt the majority of his member being taken into his roommate's ready mouth, he let out a small moan. His eyes remained opened and focused on Zac.

Zac's eyes opened, his gaze rising so he could look his roommate in the eyes as he went down on him. Taylor cracked a smile, which instantly caused Zac to do the same. Ultimately, he decided that he couldn't look at Taylor. He would get too distracted by the man's beauty.

Zac pulled off completely, replacing his mouth with his hand. He quickly stroked Taylor, his hand moving rapidly along. Every once in awhile, Zac would slow down so he could run his thumb along Taylor's tip, appreciating the ample amount of pre-cum that had been leaking from it.

"Excited, huh?" Zac joked, causing Taylor to smile and chuckle.

"Shut up," was all that Taylor said, his lips still curved up into a smile as he said the words.

"Make me," Zac said after a brief hesitation. Taylor raised a brow.

"You want that?" Taylor asked, although they hadn't exactly discussed what "that" was. Regardless of this, Zac nodded. He wanted whatever Taylor wanted.

Zac wrapped his lips around Taylor's tip yet again, taking his time in bobbing his head. Considering his sexual frustration and their previous conversation, Taylor decided to take matters into his own hands.

He brought his hands down so he could bury his fingers in the messy hair atop Zac's head. Even though he expected it, the younger male was still somewhat taken by surprise when he felt his head being forced further down. His eyes went wide, although he did not resist, nor did he gag. It took him a moment to adjust, which he signaled by placing his hand in the air as a way to let Taylor know to calm down for a moment. Once he was ready for more, he lowered his hand and looked up at Taylor through his lashes.

Zac's hands rested on Taylor's hips as he allowed the curly-haired male to do as he pleased. So he did, moving his hips and Zac's head in sync.

The only break that Zac was given was when Taylor warned him of his oncoming orgasm. Zac pulled away, wiped the bit of saliva from the corners of his mouth, and brought his hand around Taylor's length.

Zac could tell that Taylor's orgasm would make an appearance any second. Although he was not in the mood to swallow you-know-what, he was also not in the mood to clean up their mess.

So he wrapped his lips around Taylor's length once again, though he held the other man's hips down so he could not continue with his previous actions. It didn't take long for Taylor to reach his own release, his eyes screwed shut as he finally reached his high of pure euphoria.

It took a moment for Taylor to collect himself after that. He was breathless, eyes shut as though he was prepared to fall asleep. Just in case he was planning on doing so, though, Zac gave his arm a pinch.

"What?" Taylor asked in a tone that made it obvious he was not happy with Zac's small gesture.

"You said you'd get me off as well," Zac said with a frown.

"Oh, I forgot," he lied. He had been hoping that Zac would forget, but he was not so lucky in this instance.

Zac squinted at his roommate, knowing that he was full of it. "Sure you did," he said sarcastically, receiving a shove against his shoulder.

The two of them switched positions, but Zac was on his hands and knees with Taylor behind him. The younger of the two let out a sigh of contentment.

All of this was so new to Taylor. If he were honest, he had no clue what he was doing. But he could learn, especially considering how understanding, helpful, and surprisingly patient Zac was with him.

Taylor brought his hand around, his index and middle fingers extended. "Can you suck my fingers?" he asked casually, as if he had just requested for Zac to pass the salt.

Zac eagerly accepted Taylor's fingers into his own mouth, sucking on them with an enthusiasm that mirrored what he had shown just minutes before.

When Zac released Taylor's fingers from his mouth, Taylor bit his lip and spoke, "Hey Zac?"

"Yeah?"

"Can, uh...can you call me daddy?"

Zac slowly turned his head around, his eyes squinted.

"No," he simply replied after a moment of hesitation.

"Fair enough."

Acting like that interaction had never taken place, the (unofficial) couple went back to business. Taylor lined his fingertips with his roommate's entrance, giving no warning whatsoever before pushing his fingers inside of him. No lube was provided, instead, Zac's saliva worked as a lubricant.

"Jesus Christ, Taylor, you gotta give a guy a warning," Zac said immediately. Taylor shrugged.

"Don't bring Jesus into this," Taylor said in a high-pitched voice, mocking the words that Zac had said the night before.

"You suck," Zac said with a roll of his eyes.

"Actually, _you_ suck. Get it? Because you were just--" he started, but was interrupted.

"Yes, I get it. I hate you sometimes, you know."

"You sure 'bout that?" Taylor asked, beginning to move his fingers. The movement took Zac by surprise, causing him to gasp. He nodded his head, although a more accurate feeling would not be hatred, but love towards Taylor.

Taylor began moving his fingers quicker, which caused the pain to worsen. Zac winced, waiting for the pleasure to come to him.

It was awkward for both of them, both hoping for some sort of pleasure. But as soon as Taylor curled his fingers, Zac let out a soft whine. His eyes slipped shut as soon as this pleasure hit him.

"Right there," Zac said with a breathy moan. Taylor was pleased to know that he had finally done the right thing. He smirked as he continued this motion, keeping his fingers curled.

"Still hate me?" Taylor asked with a smirk. Although Zac was in the middle of whining, he still managed to nod his head.

"You sure?" Taylor practically grunted out. He began to move his fingers faster, hitting that special spot with every thrust of his fingers. Zac nodded once again.

Immediately after nodding, he lowered his hand to firmly wrap it around his cock. Taylor instantly swatted the hand away, forcing Zac not to touch himself.

"I don't want you to touch yourself. I want to make you cum just like this," Taylor said, continuing to move his fingers. Zac whined.

Taylor's history with pleasuring females seemed to be coming in handy (no pun intended), even with the difference of anatomy and _where_ his fingers were going. He continued to curl his fingers and then straighten them slightly, this process repeating.

"Still hate me?" Taylor asked, his words being pretty much growled out.

 _"No,_ I don't hate you. Now can I _please_ touch myself?" Zac begged, beginning to move his hand down before he even received permission.

Again, Taylor swatted his hand away. "No," was all he said. Once again, Zac whined.

Taylor continued pleasuring Zac for a few minutes more. Eventually, a stronger sense of pleasure began to form in the belly of the younger male.

"Dude, I'm gonna cum," Zac warned his roommate.

"Did you _really_ just call me dude?" Taylor asked, though he did not pause or even slow down the movement of his hand.

"Yeah," was all Zac got out, his hands balled up into fists as he let Taylor continue. It didn't take much longer until Zac found himself blindly bucking his hips forward, as if he would receive more pleasure from doing so. The pleasure soon hit him full force, causing a loud moan to pass his lips. His release landed on his blankets, creating a mess that Zac had been trying to prevent. He sighed as soon as he noticed this, considering that was the last thing he wanted. The pleasure made it worth it, though.

Once they were done, Zac removed the messy blanket from his bed and lay down beside Taylor.

"Wanna go on a date?" Taylor asked. Zac raised a brow.

"Are you sure? When?" he asked.

"Yes, I'm sure. Tonight. You want to?"

Zac rapidly nodded his head, which caused Taylor to smile. He leaned closer, pressing a kiss to his roommate's lips with that same, constant smile.


	20. let's make this night last forever

That night, Taylor and Zac made their way to Times Square. Both of them wanted to hold hands, but neither of them were man enough to say something about what they wanted.

"Where do you want to eat?" Taylor asked as he walked alongside Zac, both of them scanning the hectic area.

"What?" Zac shouted and looked over at Taylor. He had been so distracted by the busy city that he hadn't heard Taylor's words. Also, it was rather loud.

With a laugh, Taylor repeated the question.

"Oh, uh, I don't care. Up to you, I guess," Zac said.

Taylor's eyes scanned the area once again, this time in search of anything good to eat.

"How about sushi?" Taylor suggested. Zac scoffed.

"They'll probably serve us fish straight from the sewer," Zac replied, causing Taylor to smile.

"You're so difficult," Taylor said with a grin.

"I have an idea. We should go to Shake Shack,"  Zac suggested with a nod.

"What's that?" Taylor asked with a raised brow, having never seen or heard of the chain restaurant before Zac had mentioned it.

Zac's mouth gaped open. "You've _never_ heard of it?" he asked, receiving a shrug from his roommate.

"We're going, then. We can share a milkshake or something," Zac said, immediately pulling Taylor towards the crowded restaurant, which could likely be seen from a mile away with its large, glowing sign.

After half an hour of waiting, the couple placed their orders and, soon after, were finally seated directly next to one of the restaurant's large windows. As Taylor looked outside with amazement that mirrored that of a child, Zac asked, "Have you ever been to Times Square before?"

Taylor slowly shook his head. "Never. What about you?"

Zac nodded. "A few times. I lived in New Jersey when I was a little kid. Not very close to New York, though, so I came here maybe once or twice. Don't remember it too well, sadly. But maybe that's not so bad, after all. You and I can create new memories together," he said with a smile, slowly reaching over to take Taylor's hand into his own. Initially, Taylor flinched and pulled his hands away.

"I'm, um, I'm sorry. Just not used to that," he said with an awkward laugh and returned his hands to their original locations, allowing Zac to hold them as he had planned to do.

They continued their conversations until their food was prepared, and from there, their meal went smoothly. They shared a milkshake, scarfed down their food, and held hands for the majority of dinner. As great as the night was going, Taylor was still being weighed down by a question he was ready to ask.

"Ready to go?" Zac asked, now holding both of Taylor's hands in his own.

Taylor shook his head. He let out a heavy breath. Confused, Zac raised a brow, but did not say a word.

"I'm not leaving until you agree to be my boyfriend."

Zac's lips parted. He was speechless. Though he wanted this, he didn't expect it. He should have, considering they were on a date, but he still had not expected that to be brought up, at least not yet.

"You say it like I don't want that. Yes, I'll be your boyfriend," Zac replied. With no shame whatsoever, the two of them kissed, smiling throughout.

Their lips separated after a moment, something now weighing on Zac's mind that he felt the need to discuss.

"Are you gonna tell people in your frat? I mean, you don't have to, I guess..." he trailed off with a slight frown. Secretly, though, he wanted Taylor to be honest with his frat brothers and tell them all about the relationship.

Taylor shrugged and sighed. "I should tell Logan. It'll be weird if he walks in on us fucking or something," Taylor said, earning a laugh from the younger half of the couple.

"But other than that, I don't think I _want_ to tell people. They'll just make fun of me," Taylor explained. Zac nodded slowly. He somewhat understood where Taylor was coming from, but he also _so_ badly wanted to make their relationship public.

He let out a small sigh. "Fine, I'll...I'll call you daddy if you tell them," Zac said, having lowered his voice to prevent others from hearing them. Plus, he was not proud of the statement. He was already kinkshaming himself.

"I'll tell them," Taylor said with no hesitation whatsoever.


	21. out

"I can't tell them," Taylor said nervously as he and his boyfriend sat together in their dorm room. The two boys were cuddled up to one another beneath several layers of blankets, all due to the lack of heating in their cold dormitory. Body heat of another was needed. The cold air also happened to be a perfect excuse to cuddle each other.

It was the final Saturday before their winter break would commence. Taylor had _promised_ Zac that he would tell his fraternity brothers prior to the students' winter vacation. This would be the last time that all of them would be together before break. It was his last chance. He didn't _want_ to break the promise that he had made to Zac, but he was _very_ nervous.

"You know what will happen if you _don't_ do it," Zac said with his head pressed to Taylor's chest.

Taylor let out a loud sigh before saying, "I know." He wasn't going to lose his boyfriend if he didn't do it, but he would no longer be called the _special_ name that was reserved for the times in which they fucked.

By this time, many of the people in Taylor's life that he valued knew about his relationship. He dreaded the question he was asked every single time. "So are you gay or bi?" He didn't know the answer. He would just shrug and ignore the question from there. He liked Zac, and that was all that he needed to know for now.

Logan knew, Taylor's brothers knew, and the couple had a feeling that Mrs. York knew as well. Although Zac had known of his sexuality for years, his family, surprisingly, was unaware of it. He knew how his family felt about anyone who was "different", so he chose to keep quiet about it. Therefore, Taylor didn't force Zac to tell his family members the truth.

Later that day, Zac and Taylor prepared themselves for the final frat party before the new year.

"I don't know if we should even go," Taylor argued as they were getting dressed. "We should study for finals."

Zac scoffed. "As if you study for _anything."_

He had a good point. No more arguing about whether or not to go.

"They won't even care," Zac later said to Taylor as they walked to the frat house. Taylor shrugged in response. He wanted to believe that, he really did. But it was difficult to do so when his anxiety prevented him from believing it.

Logan had decided to walk with them, which he was beginning to regret. He was the third wheel, trailing shortly behind them due to the lack of space on the sidewalk.

"You know," the kiwi started, "I don't think they'll care. They're supposed to support you regardless of things like that, so why _should_ they care?"

He had a valid point. Taylor just looked away and sighed. "Whatever. We'll see. Just let me get some alcohol in my system first."

Fair enough. Nearly two hours into the party, Taylor had finally consumed enough alcohol to feel confident enough to tell the entire party his secret. Zac remained close to him the entire time. Of his peers that knew, which consisted only of Logan and Zac, neither of them were aware of how this announcement was going to be made.

Taylor drunkenly climbed onto the randomly placed pool table, interrupting an ongoing game.

"Excuse me!" he shouted. Nobody heard him. He continued shouting for a few minutes more, eventually reaching a point where he decided to remove his shirt to draw the attention of the crowd. This did exactly as he had hoped, bringing in the attention of many of the boys and girls within the frat house. He shouted once more, earning the attention of a few more of his frat brothers and other partygoers.

"Hi, I'm Taylor. I'm in this frat and I just, I just wanna say that I'm Taylor and I have a boyfriend!" he slurred with one arm raised as if this was a life-changing victory. Maybe it was, though.

Everyone immediately returned to what they had been doing, not at all caring for Taylor's statement. It wasn't that they didn't care about _him,_ just didn't think it was important. It didn't change the way any of them — or most of them, rather — thought of him. He expected there to be a homophobe here or there but he would deal with that after winter break.

He climbed off of the pool table, being approached by the upperclassman Jon, whom he had befriended earlier in the year.

"It's pretty cool that you felt comfortable enough to tell everyone that," Jon said with a smile. Taylor's lips curved up into an almost identical expression.

It was finally over with. Taylor was so relieved and Zac was so proud of him. The two walked back to their dorm shortly after, holding hands and giving one another kisses here and there for the majority of the walk back. They knew that things were not going to be easy, but in that carefree moment, they didn't focus on the negatives. All they cared about was one another and the love they would now be able to show to the world.


End file.
